#pro tip! never do this in real life. in my experience it always bites you in the ass

[transingthoseformers]

That little feeling when you have to pronounce a character poor little meow meow

Like. Fuck, this grown ass character is so pathetic i have to adopt them and help them against my will

[kikilefangirl]

Owed

Steve Rogers x Reader

(Word Count: 1377)

(Found this gif on Google images, so credit to whoever made it)

“Right this way, Miss.” 

You followed the security guard through the gala’s main entrance hall. 

Adorned with sparkling jewelry all through your hair, and matching diamond and ruby necklace and ring set, you were a vision in red. Your form fitting, crimson gown had a wide side slit, offset by your black velvet gloves. 

Eyes were drawn to you as you all but glided across the room. The chandelier bathed your brown skin in a warm glow. On your first sweep you spied three generals, quite a few senators, and a room full of dutiful donors and their plus ones. Not one journalist. 

“We need exactly forty-six minutes and eighteen seconds,” Mo, a crew member of yours, told you over comms. If they needed it, you’d get it. 

“Alright, just get it done.” You replied under your breath. 

“Yes, ma’am,” Mo responded and the line cut out. You grabbed a glass of champagne from a nearby waiter and took a sip. 

“Care for a dance, doll?” 

You were getting sloppy on the job. You had to be, because to miss such an obstacle as Captain America and whatever other agents he brought with him, would have never happened five years ago. You shook off your surprise and smiled, your lips parting to show white teeth. 

“I don’t know, a dance with a handsome stranger seems too cliché,” You teased. He lit up at his supposed anonymity.

“Steve. Do I get upgraded from stranger enough for a dance?” He persisted, but made no moves toward you. 

What a gentleman, you thought to yourself.

“I guess you do,” You lifted your gloved arm to him, expectantly.

Steve gently squeezed your hand and led you to the dance floor. The two of you were a perfect fit as you swayed across the room. Other guests gawked, with either jealousy or curiosity, you didn’t know. As the song ended the two of you stood, still close enough together for your breaths to intermingle.

During your dance you counted the two agents Steve brought with them out of the corner of your eye. One was a woman, blonde. Probably SHIELD. The other was a man with a gap toothed grin. He didn’t move like a regular agent, but definitely trained. 

You needed more time. 

“Thanks for the dance, Steve. See you around,” You said, sounding as flippant as you could.

As you pulled away, Steve whirled in front of you offering his arm. You linked yours with his and smirked up at him as he led through the crowd. He leaned down to your ear. 

“Gorgeous, your face didn’t come up once on the guest list,” he whispered. You didn’t react, allowing him to guide you further away from the crowd. 

“Since I’ve been made, I gotta say you’re a great dance partner, Captain.” You countered. 

The male agent was waiting for the two of you in a corner off to the side. Steve’s grip tightened, pulling you closer to him. In a threat assessment, Steve wanted you more towards him than his second in command. A selfless leader willing to put his life in danger over his team’s. 

So he was as much of a dream in real life as he was in your history books growing up.

“Why is it always the fine ones?” Number Two complained as Steve sat you down. You were flanked on either side, quite literally backed into a corner. 

“Nine minutes and twenty three seconds, remaining,” Mo called out in your earpiece. You didn’t reply. Instead, you caught a glimpse of the female making the rounds, most likely checking for any others. 

“You can call your girl off, I don’t bite.” You teased. Steve folded his arms over each other and leaned towards you. 

“Why are you here?” He asked. His lips twitched and he coughed when he caught you staring at them. You looked him in the eye with no shame. 

They were nice lips for a white guy.

“You know, I didn’t peg you as the type who only protects rich white folk, but I guess that’s why your partner’s here. To look out for the rest of us,” Your eyes flicked over to the dark skinned man. He was refreshing, really. 

“I’ll ask again: why are you here?” Steve demanded through a tight lipped smile. To spectators, it looked like you and the captain were flirting, so they tried to avert their gazes.

“You play with toys, Captain. I do business.” You stated, not missing a beat. 

You removed a ruby ring from your gloved hand and sat it across the table. Both men watched you and it like hawks. 

“I take what I am owed by my country, because my country didn’t love me enough to do right by me the first time. Your partner understands.” You said in a breathy voice. 

“I get paid just fine.” He told you. You were right about him not being an agent. You could feel the military bravado coming off him from a mile away. 

“Two minutes.” Mo said. You smirked. 

“Sure you do, soldier. But do you get paid his bucks?” You asked him, never sparing Steve a glance. 

You had a feeling the answer was no. 

“I have a pension with seventy years worth of interest on it. Now, what’s your name?” 

You smiled and turned towards him. Finally, a better question.

“Y/N. Ask your friend Bucky about me. I doubt he’s here, so ask him when—“

Steve cut you off. The games were over with. His expression darkened, his blue eyes harsher than when they first appeared. 

“You’re stalling. Fan out and find whoever she’s protecting.” He ordered. 

Both the soldier and the agent separated to look for your crew. They were long gone. Steve’s iron grip kept you in place, the advantages of a super soldier. 

“Pro-tip Captain, it’s only stalling if you need the extra time. I just like hearing you talk.” You admitted. 

Taking your free hand, you flagged down a waiter. As he drew nearer, your eyes turned a startling shade of purple and so did the waiter’s. Before Steve could react, you used your power to get inside the poor waiter’s head and made him see the single most person he wanted to hurt. 

It was an older man, probably his father. Predictable. 

The waiter launched himself at Steve before he could react, and the hand that gripped you was no more. You slid out from the  small booth and out in the open. The man was going rabid, but Steve was fending him off in the nicest possible way. The attention of the crowd was on them, but the soldier from earlier wasn’t as easily fooled. 

“I’m on her.” He replied, pushed through the masses to get to you. 

“Sorry, man. I hate to do this to a brother, but...” You trailed off, and your eyes flashed purple again. 

You made him see what he wanted most. This time the man, Sam, was stuck in a vision about him, dawning the Captain’s shield. Go figure. Sam stood stock still, his dark eyes turned a vibrant purple. You slipped out of the front door into a waiting car. 

As the driver sped off, you could see Steve bounding down the street after you. He recovered from your little sideshow, and was gaining on you. Damn, he was good. 

Opening up the skylight, you made eye contact with him, stopping him in his tracks. The vision was of you and him dancing like you had been doing only an hour ago. 

So he was a romantic at heart. 

You sat back down and used your powers to nudge Steve closer to the curb. You had no doubt that the man could take the hit, but there was something about him that stopped you from allowing it to happen. 

Besides, incoming traffic honked and swerved to avoid being hit by you or him, anyway. No civilian would be seriously injured and your stunt put enough distance between the two of you that you weren’t followed. 

“All thirty mil is accounted for and ready for distribution.” Mo sounded off. You smiled and fingered your diamond necklace. 

“Great work everyone, you know what to do,” you praised your team through your earpiece. The only bumps in the plan came from your end. You clicked off your comms and put it in your purse. 

As you sat back in your seat and pulled up the partition, your mind drifted to the Captain. You went off into the night with the memory of a handsome man who kept you on your toes all night. It was a shame you couldn’t enjoy him longer. 

“Goodnight, Steve.” You whispered. 

A secret goodbye to a man who wasn’t yours and would never hear it. 

                                                    …

“JARVIS, I need you to ID someone for me. Keyword: Y/N.” 

Steve was standing in Avengers Tower in an undershirt and the dress pants he had on earlier. He was staring intensely at the only image the camera could get of the jaw dropping woman who bested him. He blushed just thinking of the images you made him see. 

“She’s in the wind, man. And that’s probably a fake name.” Sam chimed in as he entered the room, yawning.

“She made me see things,” Steve started, but Sam threw his hand up with a look of almost guilt in his eyes.

Steve elected to ignore that. 

“Sir, there is no record of a Y/N ever existing.” JARVIS stated.

Steve clenched his jaw and thought back to what you said about Bucky. 

“JARVIS, pull up Hydra’s enhanced program. I doubt we’d get a name, but a list of abilities and weaknesses will do. Cross reference with any known or suspected holding facilities Bucky was in.” He ordered. 

Sucking in a breath, he still smelled hints of your perfume. It had been so long since he held a woman without the last name Carter. It was different, but he enjoyed it right up until the part where Sam said you were an uninvited guest with no ID. 

Steve had the worst luck with women. 

JARVIS pinged up a short list of Hydra experiments. 

Only one fit.

“Sam, can you go wake up, Buck. We need to talk to him about his ex-cellmate.” 

[magic-and-moonlit-wings]

Chapter 55: Movie Night

Lots of quotes from the movie Lilo & Stitch ahead! Fewer quotes, but some, from Trolls and Frozen.

Bold italics are trollish, ~tildes~ indicate goblin.

Content warnings for this chapter: Swearing. Here we reach the story's first F-bomb.

Also, there is some talk between characters about the harshness of life in the Darklands, how Changelings are treated by the Gumm-Gumms, and mentions of cannibalism.

This was supposed to be a light-happy chapter that got feels-y at the end, but then it went and got all dark on me.

Oh, also-also, (Not) Enrique finds out Claire flirted with Jim a while ago and misinterprets what exactly happened between them, but that gets cleared up fast.

Becoming The Mask

Once again, Javier and Ophelia Nuñez were out for the evening, leaving Claire in charge of Enrique. Claire had gotten permission to invite "some friends" over to watch movies. Jim and Toby arrived to find Mary and Darci already there – Jim suspected, like the time he'd 'babysat', that Claire had purposefully asked him to arrive after she knew her parents would be gone.

They set up piles of cushions and blankets on the floor between the couch and the TV. Jim propped the Amulet up on the coffee table they'd pushed to one side. Maybe some of the ghost Trollhunters would be interested in human movies.

"Finally get your fill of the touchy-feelies?" Enrique teased Jim, seeing how they were all seated separately. Jim snorted.

"Not hardly." He pulled the smaller Changeling in for a hug. "Humans just have different rules about casual touching, is all. Freezing to death's not really a concern in this climate."

"Wait, what?" said Toby, dropping the pillow he'd been holding. Jim looked up to see all the humans staring at him.

"Darklands thing," said Enrique easily. "Gets cold there."

"We'd sleep in piles," Jim explained. "I had a bit of a reputation for being … clingy."

"If you weren't good at finding food and soft stuff, we'd never've put up with ya." Enrique proved himself a liar by climbing onto Jim's shoulders instead of jumping back to the floor. He fluffed the hair on Jim's scalp. "Jimmy-boy got his first nickname for that."

"Shut up," said Jim playfully. "Anyway, humans get weird about touching around puberty. I can still hug Mom whenever I want, but Toby gets embarrassed if I hug him around other people, and Claire, Mary, and Darci haven't given me permission to touch them casually yet."

"… Did you … want permission?" asked Claire. "You, kinda, said you were uncomfortable with that, I thought."

"No, it was more wondering if you were flirting with me that felt weird," Jim assured her. "After that conversation I felt like it'd be awkward to bring up that I was open to hugging and such."

Jim thought he felt Enrique growl, to quietly to properly hear. His hand, still in Jim's hair, changed position so the tips of Enrique's claws were on Jim's scalp.

"When exactly did this happen?" Enrique asked.

"Claire kissed Jim on the cheek on his birthday and then Jim said he wasn't interested in dating her," said Mary.

"Also that I realized she might not have meant it in a flirty way and if I was misinterpreting things she could ignore what I was saying," Jim added. The claws retreated.

Claire looked away. "So what movie did we want to start with?"

"Lilo & Stitch!" exclaimed Darci, looking through the shelves. "I haven't watched this in forever!"

"That's a good one." Jim tilted his head to get Enrique back in his peripheral vision. "Enrique, have you seen it yet?"

"… Yeah."

"Isn't that the one that always makes you cry?" asked Toby.

"It's beautiful. Of course I cry."

Stitch was a constructed 'abomination', who shapeshifted to blend in, and his adopted family found out what he truly was and still wanted him. How could Jim be expected to keep his composure in the face of that?

"So, quick question," said Jim. "Is talking during the movie a crime, or is commentary what makes it a group activity?"

"Commentary," said all three girls together.

"Okay, good." Jim and Toby usually talked during movies, unless one or both of them were seeing it for the first time. Sometimes even then.

+=+

"Not guilty! My experiments are only theoretical, and completely within legal boundaries."

"We believe you actually created something."

"Created something? Ha! But that would be irresponsible, and, unethical. I would never, ever – make more than one."

"What is that monstrosity?"

"Monstrosity?! What you see before you is the first of a new species!"

"You have to wonder if she and Merlin ever had a talk like this," Enrique muttered in Jim's ear. Jim snickered.

"And as for that abomination … it is the flawed product of a deranged mind. It has no place among us."

Jim stopped laughing and cringed. He loved this movie a lot, but some of it stung.

+=+

"A quiet capture would require an understanding of 626 that we do not possess! Who, then, Mr Pleakley, would you send for his extraction?"

"… Does he have a brother? Close grandmother, perhaps?"

"Fun fact," said Darci, "in early drafts Stitch was a career criminal and Jumba was an old accomplice."

"Friendly cousin? Neighbour with a beard?"

+=+

"Surely the teacher won't notice I was late if he doesn't see me come in!" Claire narrated sarcastically.

+=+

"I'm sorry, Scrump!" Mary wailed, as Lilo ran back to retrieve the doll she'd angrily thrown aside.

+=+

"Let me illuminate to you the precarious situation in which you have found yourself. I am the one they call when things go wrong. And things have indeed gone wrong."

"As a cook, that kitchen horrifies me," said Jim.

+=+

"If you promise not to fight anymore, I promise not to yell at you – except on special occasions."

"Tuesdays and bank holidays would be good."

The entire group cracked up.

"How does kid Lilo's age even know what a bank holiday is?" said Claire. "I don't even know what a bank holiday is!"

"Maybe she saw it printed on a calendar?" said Toby.

+=+

A raindrop fell on Stitch's head. He fired his ray gun into the sky. It started raining, hard.

"Oh, no, I broke the sky!" Darci cried.

+=+

"Does it have to be this dog?"

"He survived getting hit by a truck, how much more sturdy and not-gonna-die do you want?" asked Jim.

"Yes. He's good. I can tell."

+=+

"I'm sorry I bit you. And pulled your hair. And punched you in the face."

Mary nudged Claire. "Remind you of anyone?"

Like sunflowers, everyone else popped up and turned towards them.

Claire blushed. "We got into a fight in first grade and for like two days we decided we didn't want to be friends anymore, then our moms made us say sorry."

"He will be irresistibly drawn to large cities, where he will back up sewers, reverse street signs, and steal everyone's left shoe."

"It's weird they get in trouble for everything but this," commented Enrique. "Human grown ups might not believe a dog stole a trike, but wouldn't they think Lilo did it? She's fought the other kid before."

"It's nice to live on an island with no large cities."

+=+

"It's not an angel, Lilo, I don't even think it's a dog!"

"Isn't that the rolling thing Draal can do?" said Toby.

"Yeah, more or less," said Jim. "I mean, I don't think Draal bites his feet – but maybe that's the trick."

"At least with those stick legs you've got," said Enrique. He curled into a ball and rolled in a circle around the group. "Face it, you're out of proportion for this move."

+=+

"626 was designed to be a monster. But now, there is nothing to destroy. You see, I never gave him a greater purpose. What must it be like, to have nothing? Not even memories to visit, in the middle of the night?"

"Now, this next bit I don't care for," said Jim. "The Ugly Duckling is a messed-up story."

"What've you got against The Ugly Duckling?" asked Mary.

"The blatant segregationist propaganda? 'A swan will never fit in with ducks and everyone is better off sticking with their own kind'. You don't even have to read it as a race metaphor. Between that and The Little Mermaid, I thought for while that Hans Christian Anderson was a Changeling writing cautionary tales about why we shouldn't get attached to humans."

"… Was he?" asked Claire.

"Probably not. I couldn't find any real evidence and the rest of his work doesn't match the pattern."

"Counterpoint," said Darci. "The Ugly Duckling is pro-integration. Everyone thought he was an ugly duckling because they didn't know what swans look like. If he'd grown up with ducks and swans around, they could've judged him for what he was instead of what he couldn't measure up to, and he might've had a happy childhood instead of only finding a community that accepted him as an adult."

Jim considered this, and nodded. "I guess I can see that, too."

+=+

"Heard you lost your job."

"Well, uh, actually, I just quit. That job. Because, you know, the hours are just not conducive to the challenges of raising a child –"

"Nani, no!" Jim begged. "I know almost nothing about Social Services but I'm pretty sure choosing to leave your only source of income looks worse to them than just losing it!"

"Thus far you have been adrift in the sheltered harbour of my patience; but I cannot ignore you being jobless. Do I make myself clear?"

"Perfectly."

"And next time I see this dog, I expect it to be a model citizen. Capiche?"

"Uh … yes?"

"New job. Model citizen. Good day."

+=+

"So, we saw Cobra on the beach after all the tourists got scared off … D'you think he was just standing there watching them the whole time?" Mary wondered out loud after the surfing sequence.

+=+

"Until we meet again …"

Lilo was about to tell Stitch about her parents. Without thinking, Jim grabbed the remote – on the coffee table, next to the amulet – to fast forward.

"What are you doing?" Darci cried. "This is one of the big emotional turning points of the film!"

Jim paused it. "Sorry. Uh … Tobes and I usually skip this scene."

"I think I can handle it," Toby assured Jim. To the girls and Enrique, he explained, "My parents died in a storm when I was two. A cruise ship, not a car accident. I got kind of upset the first time we watched this as kids, and, we got in the habit fast forwarding this part. I think I'm okay with it now."

"You're sure?" asked Jim.

"I'm sure."

"Okay …" He rewound to the point where he'd started fast forwarding.

"That's us before. It was rainy, and they went for a drive. What happened to yours?"

Jim watched Toby more than the movie for the next few minutes.

"I'll remember you, though. I remember everyone that leaves."

"Do you remember them?" Claire asked quietly.

"Only the stuff Nana tells me." Toby shrugged, and readjusted the cushions he'd propped up his arms on. "I've seen lots of pictures. A couple home movies."

+=+

"Don't run. Don't make me shoot you. You were expensive. Yes, yes, that's it, come quietly."

"I'm … waiting."

"For what?"

"Family."

"Ah. You don't have one. I made you."

"Maybe … I could –"

"You were built to destroy. You can never belong."

Jim blinked fast to keep the tears back. He sniffed, and pulled the blankets more tightly around him.

+=+

"Okay, talk! I know you had something to do with this, now where's Lilo? Talk! I know you can."

"Claire?" said Mary. "You okay?"

Jim looked over. Claire's jaw was clenched, and her hands were tight on the blanket, and her eyes were huge and fixed on the screen, and she was shaking.

"Ah … maybe the little sib getting snatched by otherworldly forces wasn't the best movie choice," Enrique said. He reached out like he was about to go to Claire, then pulled back his hand and hunkered down where he was.

"LILO! She's a little girl this big, she has black hair and brown eyes, and she hangs around with that THING!"

"I'm. Fine," Claire insisted.

"You're sure?"

"We can just fast forward."

"I said I'm fine!"

"Okay …"

Mary and Darci each scooted their blanket and cushion piles closer to Claire's, bracketing her on either side. Jim tactfully retreated to the Nuñezes kitchen to microwave a few more bags of popcorn. Enrique went with him. They could still hear the TV.

"What? After all you put me through, you expect me to help you just like that? Just like that?!"

"Ih."

"Fine."

"Fine? You're doing what he says?"

"Ah, he is very persuasive."

"Is it normal to feel bad for her?" Enrique asked.

"I think so? It's an awkward situation for both of you." Jim selected the white cheddar flavour. "But it's not like there's an alternative. You're not a polymorph. And really, the only reason she's upset is because she found out."

The Nuñezes had the same microwave as the Lakes. Jim didn't find the popcorn setting especially useful for this brand of popcorn – it tended to burn a third of the kernels– so he used the timer instead.

"I never apologized to you for that, did I?" Jim asked.

"It wasn't all your fault."

"Still, I'm sorry for my part in getting you caught."

The Changelings got back to the living room in time to see the unfortunate tourist lose his ice cream for the third time.

+=+

"Does Stitch have to go in the ship?"

"Yes."

"Can Stitch say goodbye?"

"… Yes."

Like he always did during this scene, Jim cried. He let himself do it this time.

+=+

"Wait, how is Little Mermaid a cautionary tale?" asked Enrique during the credits. The camera panned over a photo of Stitch reading to a flock of ducklings. "For getting attached, I mean. I thought the moral of that one was to control yer temper and be careful who you made deals with?"

"Sure, the Disney version," said Jim. "They adapted it to make a more dramatic, less depressing story. And give the characters names. In the older version, the sea witch is actually a neutral character. The terms of the mermaid's transformation are that she's traded her tongue for legs, but walking on land hurts, and she'll become fully human if the prince marries her, but if he marries anybody else, she'll die."

"That doesn't sound neutral."

"Wait for it. The prince gets engaged to a human princess, so the mermaid's older sisters trade their hair to the sea witch for a magic knife and a loophole; if the little mermaid kills the prince before the wedding, she can turn back into a mermaid and survive."

"Kay, I see it now."

"Except she doesn't go through with the kill, so she dies, and because she wasn't really human, she doesn't have a proper soul, so her spirit's not allowed to go to Heaven."

"… Whoa."

"I know, right?"

"I mean," Mary commented, "not murdering somebody is kind of a low bar for moral decency. It's not as if the prince owed her anything just because she was attracted to him."

"No, no, whether the prince deserved to die or not is irrelevant," said Jim. "The point is that the mermaid had a chance to, objectively, trade one life for another, and because she was attached to the particular person she'd have to kill, she didn't prioritize her own survival, and therefore suffered."

"Wouldn't the guilt of murder have caused suffering anyway?" Toby pointed out.

"Not if she wasn't attached," Jim insisted. How were they not getting this? "If she could've just cut the throat of any random human, she'd've been fine. The moral of the story is that caring about people causes pain. That's what makes it depressing."

"Do you like any fairy tales?" asked Darci.

"Sure. Just not most of Anderson's work."

"What should we watch next?" said Claire hospitably. "If we're on a 'sister movies' theme, I've got Frozen."

"Isn't that one also based on an Anderson fairy tale?" said Mary.

"Not really," said Jim. "The Snow Queen was more 'inspiration' than 'source material'. Elsa never kidnaps anyone, and they left out the broken enchanted mirror. Plus it's fun to see all the different ways humans think trolls are like."

"We also have the Trolls movie," said Claire. "I haven't watched it yet. My dad got it for Mom's birthday because she used to collect the dolls."

"I haven't seen that one yet, either," Darci commented.

"Should we?" said Mary. "Any other votes?"

"I'm game for whatever," said Toby. "This one's a musical, right? Those are always fun."

Jim squirmed.

He hadn't watched this movie despite his curiosity, after an online clip of the opening had explained the premise. Getting eaten alive was his greatest fear. Did he want to watch a movie about trolls narrowly avoiding being eaten? Did he want to explain why he didn't want to watch it?

While he debated, the movie got put in.

"Once upon a time, in a happy forest, in the happiest tree, lived the happiest creatures the world has ever known: the trolls. They loved nothing more than to sing, and dance, and hug, and dance and hug and sing and dance and sing and hug –"

Enrique started laughing.

Oh, shit, Jim hadn't warned him.

"Uh, Enrique –"

"Ssh! This is ridiculous. I mean, the huggy bit's kind of like you, but the rest of it – ha!"

"But then one day, the trolls were discovered by – a Bergen!"

"The trolls are gonna –"

"Ji-im! Spoilers!" Toby hissed.

"They were the most miserable creatures in all the land."

Jim grabbed Enrique and covered his eyes. The smaller Changeling yelped and squirmed. Jim switched forms so his fingers wouldn't bleed from the clawing.

Enrique got his eyes uncovered just in time to see the Bergen flick a troll into its mouth.

The onscreen troll's exclamation of "Oh my god!" was drowned out by Enrique's much more lurid cursing.

"What the –?" The girls and Toby all turned to stare. Claire pointed at Enrique accusingly. "I knew that didn't mean 'I'm sorry'!"

"The hell kinda movie is this?! Why would you watch this?!" He twisted to look at Jim, who let go of him rather than risk yanking his scruff by accident. "You knew?!"

"I saw a bit of it on the internet when it first came out. That's why I froze up when Claire suggested it."

That … that was the wrong thing to say. Enrique rounded on Claire. A techno-rock cover of In The Hall Of The Mountain King boomed from the movie soundtrack.

"Why in FUCK'S NAME would you think we'd WANT to watch trolls get EATEN? Is this some kind of threat?"

"How the fuck would it be a threat?" Claire shot back, stealing some cushions from Mary to prop herself up taller without getting out of her blanket cocoon.

"Most Changelings –" Jim started to say.

"DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY TIMES I'VE ALMOST BEEN EATEN?" Enrique roared. "I DON'T! CAUSE IT'S A LOT!"

"We've all had close calls," Jim finished. "Nyarlagroths, Hellheetis, goblins if you catch them in the wrong mood, Gruesomes if you're already hurt, Stalklings, and it's a … popular threat from Gumm-Gumms."

"You forgot the sloorbeasts," said Enrique bitterly.

"Nobody's gotten lichen patches that bad." At least, they hadn't when Jim got out. "Have they?"

"Still counts."

"Uh, excuse me." Toby raised his hand. "I think I speak for us all when I say, what?"

"The Darklands are a hostile environment with predators and scavengers," explained Jim. "That's the other reason we slept in groups."

"Bigger targets, but we could have lookouts."

"Okay, that's its own kind of horrifying, but I was more reacting to the cannibalism?"

"Changelings don't count as real trolls," Enrique said sarcastically. "We're Impure."

He left out the part where they'd eaten their own dead. Jim didn't add it.

(It wasn't like they'd hunted each other for food. Sometimes a Changeling just died, somehow, in a way that didn't get them eaten by something else, and … well, food was scarce in the Darklands. They couldn't afford to be picky.

It also paid to keep watch over the sentry posts. Gunmar occasionally used the Decimaar Blade to post a sentry and then forgot to order them to rest and eat. Once they died, the average adult Gumm-Gumm was a meal for twenty Changelings, easily, if they could get to the body before the Gruesomes did.)

"Okay, we're switching to Frozen." Mary made the executive decision. "Wait," she said, while exchanging the disks. "If Changelings aren't trolls, how does Jim's adoption work?"

Because of course this was the perfect moment to tell Enrique about that, right in the middle of a squabble with his adopted sister.

"For one thing, most of Trollmarket still thinks I'm human." Jim switched back to human shape to illustrate the point.

"You got adopted?"

"AAARRRGGHH and Blinky thought I should have legal standing in Trollmarket outside of my job."

Enrique stared at him. Green diamond-shaped ears were pinned back. Buggy, slit-pupil eyes were wide and hurt.

"You get everything," he grumbled. "Two nicknames, and the goblins liked you, and you could always find food, and here you're the boss's favourite even when you're a traitor, and your human family still likes you, and now you get a troll family too? S'not fair."

"Hey, the goblins liked you, too." Jim was fully aware that wasn't much comfort compared to all the rest of it. "They gave you your nickname, remember?"

"They gave you one, too."

"Yeah, but you got yours first."

They probably weren't supposed to hear Darci when she muttered, "I feel like we're missing a lot of context."

"Shit," Claire muttered back. "Not Enrique told me a bit of the name part. They don't remember their names from before they were Changelings, and they don't get real names until they have Familiars, so they use nicknames instead. From each other or from goblins, he said."

"They don't get names?" Darci's voice went squeaky at the end of that.

"We're trying to come up with something other than 'Enrique' for him."

"You're trying," Enrique corrected. Darci squeaked again.

"Can we maybe circle back to the cannibalism thing?" said Toby. "That feels like the kind of trauma that should get unpacked at some point."

"I would rather leave it packed," said Jim.

"The way you blurted it out like that feels like you need to talk about it."

"Not all psychology is Freudian, Tobes."

"Do your parents still have baby name books from when they were picking Enrique's name?" Mary asked Claire. "Real Enrique, I mean."

"They didn't use one. He was named after our abuelo."

"Okay, so what about your other grandfather? What was his name?"

"Jose María." Defensively, "It's gender neutral in Spanish."

On the television screen, the movie menu finished another loop and started again.

"I tried spelling my name like it sounds, en are ee kay, but Claire said it spelled 'Nrek'. You get why I couldn't use that."

Jim laughed.

"What's funny?" asked Toby. "Is that an insult or something?"

"No, it's goblin, in English it means 'bottle'," Jim translated. "Or possibly 'container of food'." The only bottles he's seen them use held formula for the Familiars, and the word hadn't come up on the surface, so the distinction was unclear. "It's either a silly name or a really morbid one."

"Aaand we're back to the cannibalism."

"No we are not!"

"Na na na heyana, Hahiyaha naha …"

Either somebody had decided to start the movie, or the DVD had that feature where it automatically began playing if nothing was selected after a few loops of the menu.

The conversation went in circles a couple more times, then faded out.

+=+

"And who's the funky-looking donkey over there?"

"That's Sven."

"Uh-huh; and who's the reindeer?"

"… Sven."

"Oh, they're – ? Oh! Okay! Makes things easier for me."

"~Riot~," said Enrique.

"Huh?"

"My nickname. Before. It meant 'riot'."

What are you doing? Jim wanted to demand. Was Enrique just – just giving up on a real name?

"You can call me that for now. Till we work out a for-real one. Better than 'Not Enrique'."

Jim stuffed some burnt popcorn kernels into his mouth to keep from protesting. He couldn't undermine Enrique's – Riot's – chosen name, right in front of a bunch of humans, when he'd been arguing with them about how rude that was for weeks now.

"Oh. Okay." Claire half-smiled. "Riot."

Jim shut his eyes to hide the flaring glow.

+=+

Previous Chapter (Angor Rot gets treated much better, and more sensibly, than in canon, and is correspondingly less vengeful)

Table of Contents 

Next Chapter (Featuring either Otto or Gatto)

A quick thank you to Taycin on AO3 for providing some name-gender context when this chapter first went up.

[edgewaterfarmcsa]

CSA WEEK 10

P I C K L I S T

KALE - CHERRY TOMATOES - PLUM TOMATO - MELON - LEMONGRASS - THAI BASIL -

JALAPENOS - SCALLIONS - HAKURAI TURNIPS OR DAIKON RADISH -

BELL PEPPER - LEMON CUKE - SLICING CUKE - ZINNIAS!!!!

The New England growing season is terribly short (June-October).  We break up this tiny passage of time into short bursts we call seasons: strawberry season (5ish weeks), blueberry season (3ish weeks), melon season (JUST GETTING STARTED WOOT WOOT!!), etc…  These fruit bursts force you to show up and give all you got because the harvest is so fleeting and nothing during any other time of year compares to the season that you are currently in.  As we combine melon season with the entrance of tomato season, we simultaneously welcome in the real muscle season:  canning season.  August is this wild month where everything (all the crops) catch up and suddenly you are hit with this pain in your gut that SUMMER IS SHORT and SUMMER IS ALMOST OVER and holy shit, it's time to savor every bit of it and figure out ways to bottle up the sun.  So, I turn to processing veg (can/pickle/ferment/freeze) as a coping mechanism to battle the inevitable change to Fall.  Also, canning  is pretty fun and deeply satisfying and mostly delicious (however there is the occasional science fair experiment gone wrong).  From here on out, with every CSA that comes and goes, I will try my best to provide one item in bulk(ish) that will beg you to be processed, so you too, can take summer with you into the cold dark months ahead (i hate winter).   

But before we go into pro-tips and how exactly you are going to deal with all those jalapenos- I need to tell y'all about this extremely productive and joyful experience that occurred weekly alongside the CSA Summer Harvest: enter, Kayleigh season.  Kayleigh worked at the farm years prior, but we never connected- she was slingin veg at the farmstand, and I was picking veg in the field.  This year she approached us looking to get back to Edgewater and low and behold, I needed help. AND-SHE-SHOWED-UP.  Yall, Kayleigh season lasted for 9 whole weeks and I am GRATEFUL for every single one.  Working alongside Kayleigh is actual magic.  Her work ethic is insane, her jokes slap, and while paying attention to every detail of every task, she is constantly looking ahead, reading my mind, and lightening the load.  On top of all this, she glows and our convos flowed.   My best connections and life changing conversations always happen during a full day outside- sunrise to sun up- in a field, during a harvest with someone great.  She is someone great.   Kayleigh season ends today. Next week she begins Nursing school and I’m so excited for her… (to take care of me when I'm in need of medical care jkjkjk). 

All that said, so long Kayleigh season- a damn good season- all too fleeting, powerful, and so full of joy.  

PRO TIPS:

This recipe is recommended by my dear friend Sam who is a master jalapeno pickler… He gives the following suggestions:

I would use less sugar 

Also you can put the sliced jalapenos in the jar and just pour hot pickling liquid over it.

YIELD: 1 PINT SIZED JAR  The BEST recipe for easy homemade pickled jalapenos from scratch! Fresh jalapeños pickled and jarred.

15 to 20 large jalapeños, sliced, stems discarded 2 garlic cloves, smashed and peeled

1 cup distilled white vinegar 1 cup filtered water

4 tablespoons sugar (optional as it is for flavoring) 2 tablespoons kosher salt

In a medium sauce pan combine the garlic, water, vinegar, sugar and salt.

Heat to a boil, stirring to dissolve the sugar and salt. Once at a boil; add the sliced jalapenos pressing them so they are submerged under the pickling liquids. Remove the pot off of the heat and let them sit for 10-15 minutes.

Use tongs to transfer the jalapenos into a clean jar. Ladle the pickling juices over top until you've reached the top of the jar. Let cool at room temperature before securing a lid and popping them into the fridge.

I personally would treat these as I would any opened jar of jalapenos. They should last a long while if kept refrigerated in the airtight jar.

**REVISED: I've found that 20 medium jalapenos will fill a quart size jar. I upped the water and vinegar to 1-1/4 cups each. Sugar and salt stayed the same.

*This is not a canning recipe therefore not shelf stable and will need to be kept refrigerated.  With that said, I personally would treat these homemade pickled jalapeños as I would any opened jar of pickled produce in your fridge. They should last a long while if kept refrigerated in the airtight jar. Also, the spicy heat of the peppers should mellow out the longer they are in your fridge.  If looking for canning instructions or directions, follow the USDA guidelines.

BY SHOSHI PARKS (bonapp)

As its name suggests, lemongrass is a grass with botanical origins that stretch across South and Southeast Asia, from India and Sri Lanka to Indonesia and the Philippines. Also called Malabar grass, Cochin grass, or fever grass among many other names, lemongrass (Cymbopogon citratus) grows in large bushy clumps. Its stalks are woody and pale green with bulbous lighter-colored bases that are somewhat reminiscent of green onions. Used whole, chopped, or pummeled into a paste, lemongrass adds a light but complex flavor and aroma—simultaneously lemony (hence the name), gingery, and floral—to sauces, soups, and meats.

In some parts of the world, lemongrass is also treasured for its health benefits. When brewed into a tea, the plant is considered an immunity-boosting treatment for a wide variety of ailments including gastrointestinal distress, fever, and asthma.

How can you use it? In South and Southeast Asian cooking, lemongrass commonly conspires with ingredients like garlic, galangal (and/or ginger), cilantro, Thai basil, shallots, lime leaves, and coconut milk to create bold, complex flavors.

To prepare lemongrass, start by peeling the stiff outer leaves away from the stalk to reveal the slightly softer underlayers. Slice the grass in two spots, about half an inch from the root and approximately three inches up, where the whitish color begins to turn green.

The pale lower section of the lemongrass is the meatiest bit. Even so, it must be sliced thin and then finely chopped, pounded into a paste with a mortar and pestle, grated with a box grater, or tossed in a food processor so that it isn’t too tough to chew. This is frequently how lemongrass is used in Cambodian cooking, Yun says, especially in the preparation of the spice paste kroeung.

Lemongrass is often finely chopped or pounded in order to break down the tough stalks.

Once minced or pounded, lemongrass can be added to marinades or grilled meats for a touch of sweet citrusy flavor or used to brighten curry pastes and simple sauces. Powdered lemongrass works here too. “Start with one teaspoon powder per lemongrass stalk, but be sure to taste as you go to make sure you’re getting that lemony-ginger bite,” Payumo advises. 

And despite the fact that lemongrass isn’t traditionally used in recipes of Western origin, adding it to creamy pastas or homemade ice cream is an unexpected delight.

But while only the lower bulb of the lemongrass stem is edible, every portion of the stalk has a role to play in the kitchen. The fibrous upper section of the stalk is full of tons of lemony, gingery goodness. To release the flavorful oils, both Yun and Payumo like to bash or flatten the lemongrass stalk with a cleaver or the side of a large knife. Payumo will also sometimes bend the stalk back and forth a few times instead of smashing it to release the oils.

Fresh lemongrass stalks work best in dishes like soups and slow-roasted meats that simmer for long periods of time. In Filipino cuisine it’s commonly stuffed inside whole pigs or chickens and then roasted, Payumo says. Extensive simmering or roasting is also the best use for dry lemongrass, which rehydrates as it cooks. Like with bay leaves, remove the lemongrass stalks from the dish before serving. 

Bruised, oil-rich lemongrass stalks work in the glass too. They not only make a mean cocktail stirrer, but they can also infuse spirits with almost no effort at all. Go ahead, throw a lemongrass stalk or two in a bottle of vodka and let it sit for a week before drinking. You won’t be sorry.

How should you store it? If you store it right, lemongrass will pretty much last forever. Wrapped loosely in a towel, the stalks will stay fresh and flavorful for a few weeks in the fridge. Otherwise, they’ll do just fine in the freezer, either uncut or pre-prepped. Try portioning minced, pounded, or grated grass into an empty ice tray for no-fuss future use. Dried and powdered lemongrass should be kept in sealed containers and out of the light.

Now go smash, slice, and pound away. You may not be getting to South or Southeast Asia this year, but with your new lemongrass skills, at least your culinary skills will permit you to imagine.

[karajaynetoday]

everybody's got their demons, even wide awake or dreaming | part two

Photo credit: Jess Gleeson

Hello friends! Hope you’re having a lovely day. It’s time for part two of this series! Lizzie takes her opportunity to interview Calum one-on-one in this part. If you need to catch up on Part One, you can do that here. Onwards! 

(This is a fem!OC story)

Word count: 3.2k

Warnings: none? i don’t think? 

More writing here | send thoughts/feedback/suggestions here | if you’d like to be on my taglist go here

The day or so leading up to Lizzie’s one on one interview with Calum was a blur, as Lizzie tried to fix her body clock and orientate herself with how to get around LA. Her boss had offered her the opportunity to hire a rental car, but the idea of driving on the wrong side of the road was too much for Lizzie to stomach, so Ubers were the go. 

Her body sometimes overslept, sometimes woke her up at 4am, so Lizzie had downloaded a yoga and meditation app to try and sort herself out. She might’ve almost given herself a concussion after toppling over while trying to do a particularly tricky pose, but no one needed to hear about that. The bruises on her elbow were embarrassing enough. 

Danielle had sent Lizzie a text the morning of her lunchtime interview with Calum, confirming the time and place as they’d discussed. Lizzie had handwritten some notes for her questions, trying to contemplate what she could ask Calum that would differ to the others. Or maybe she should ask them all the same questions, and then in the piece she could compare and contrast responses? It was so hard to know what would make the best piece, especially with interviewing Calum in particular. Lizzie knew from watching other interviews, and in her group interview with all of the band the other day (and from back in their school days) that Calum was a man of few words. When he did speak, it was usually with purpose and thought, and made for some great content, but he wasn’t always particularly forthcoming. Which is why it had surprised Lizzie that Calum had volunteered for the first solo interview, but given Michael’s behaviour, she was glad to be continuing with the profile piece at all. 

It was a really warm day, so Lizzie had to forego her usual blazer and jeans in favour of a long green dress with blue and white flowers on it. Her hands were sweaty as the Uber pulled up to the café Calum had suggested, and something in the back of Lizzie’s mind suggested it wasn’t just from the weather. She’d always been an anxious person, but she’d gotten a handle on it recently; this whole LA debacle had brought it back with a vengeance. 

Calum was waiting for her just in front of the café, dark wayfarer sunglasses covering his eyes and his phone in his hand as he leant up against the brick wall beside the café door. He was wearing a grey hoodie and jeans, and nobody coming in or out of the café seemed to pay him any attention; but then again maybe people of Calum’s level of fame were just part of the furniture around here. It was near to Hollywood, after all.

“Hey, thanks for agreeing to meet me.” Lizzie’s voice wasn’t overly loud, but it still made Calum jump as he looked up from his phone at her.

“Of course, of course. I know I sound like a broken record, but we really are excited for you to do this piece. The new album era is something I’ve been looking forward to for a while, and - “ Calum began, smiling warmly at Lizzie, who cut him off by pulling open the café door.

“Before you start getting all meaningful and quotable on me, shall we get a coffee and take a seat?” 

“A woman after my own heart. Let’s do it. Pro-tip, the brownies here are to die for.”

The café was bustling, but most of the patrons seemed to be lining up for takeaway orders. Calum stepped ahead of Lizzie and slipped into a booth towards the back, near a frosted window, greeting the wait staff by name as he went. Lizzie scurried after him, apologising as she accidentally bumped into a tall man with her shoulder bag in her haste and he glared at her. Guess not everyone was as friendly as Calum, then. She slid into the booth opposite Calum, pulling out her notebook and phone as she went. 

“Is it okay if I record this? I’m not very good at taking notes.” 

“Straight into it, LL? At least let a man have his coffee first.” Calum deadpanned, and Lizzie felt her face fall before she realised he was joking with her.

“Of course, sorry. Let’s order. The brownies, you said? How big are they?” Lizzie pasted a smile onto her face, grabbing for the menu on the table in front of her.

“I have it on good authority that they’re perfectly Lizzie-sized. Calum-sized, too - a real multipurpose snack.” Calum was teasing her now, but also being completely serious, as he got the attention of a waitperson who came over to welcome them and take their orders. A skinny latté for Lizzie, an iced coffee for Calum, and a warmed up chocolate brownie with a side of coconut yogurt for them each. They fell into easy conversation, about the weather, and Calum’s neighbourhood, and the other pieces Lizzie had written, almost forgetting why they were there in the first place. When their order of coffees and brownies arrived, Lizzie suddenly snapped out of her feeling of ease when she had to push her notebook and phone over on the table and remember that she was supposed to be interviewing Calum Hood, 5SOS bassist, not catching up with Calum Hood, her Year 9 science lab partner. 

“Now that you’ve got your coffee, can I start recording?” Lizzie asked timidly, as she took a bite out of her brownie and audibly groaned at how heavenly it tasted.

“Depends. Will your brownie orgasm be mentioned in the article?” Could Calum say anything that wasn’t teasing her? Damn it.

“Maybe. Perhaps I’ll do a twitter thread of my trip food highlights, given that the profile piece will be under embargo until the album comes out.” Lizzie deadpanned right back, earning a smile and a small chuckle from Calum.

Lizzie hit record on her phone’s voicenote app, sliding the phone into the centre of the table. She flipped open her notebook to the page marked “Calum”, and she could see Calum trying to read her writing upside down.

“No spoilers, mate. I’ve got a strategy here.” Lizzie mused, angling her notebook so it was harder for Calum to see as he raised his hands in mock surrender.

“Well then, Ms Lawson from Junkee Australia, do your worst.” He flashed her a grin, before taking a sip of his coffee followed by a bite of his brownie (sans any groaning… that must only be a first-time brownie thing).

“So, in our chat yesterday, it was mentioned that this next album is, in some ways, a letter to your homeland, and a reflection on your journeys so far as individual artists as well as being 5SOS collectively. For you, as Calum Hood, what’s the main contribution or perspective that you feel you’ve brought to this album, and the band?” Lizzie saw a flicker of something in Calum’s eyes as she shifted into journalist mode easily, but he only paused for another sip of coffee before answering.

“I think at this point, my main contribution is balancing the collective contributions in the room. I have a lot to say, and I do a lot of songwriting, but I also think the others would agree that I’m also quite observant, so I can read a lot into things they’re saying, or not saying, and bring it out of them into the music. We’ve known each other for almost half our lives at this point, so we know each other better than anyone else, but when we work with other co writers and things like that it can be hard to feel entirely comfortable with the vulnerability you need to bring into writing a song or telling a particular story that day. I’ve got the rep as the strong, silent, shy type, I know - “ Calum paused and returned the soft smile Lizzie was giving him, as she nodded encouragingly. 

“But in interviews, when I’m being asked to explain myself and validate my artistic choices, I’m immediately more defensive and protective of it, because there’s something magical about the writing room, and the vulnerability that can only exist in that context when we’re songwriting, and creating that art. The end product, which is the song or the album or whatever, conveys the emotions in a way that I could never say them with words, and the beautiful thing is that so many people can listen to it and relate to it in ways that I’d never considered before. But that’s the power of it, you know? We make these songs to express ourselves, and fulfil our creative outlets, but it extends beyond that, and that’s the part that gets me.” Calum finished speaking and reached for another sip of his coffee.

“Right. The magic exists in the studio, and on the stage, and in individual people’s lives when they listen to the music wherever they are in the world, and it’s the connecting thread that brings you together with your fans, a moment that you can share even if you never meet.”

“Exactly, it’s the universal experience, and everyone has their own interpretation of what it means to them. Pisses me off when people try and dig to find out who we wrote a certain song about, or whatever. Sometimes it is a specific person or a moment, other times I make shit up to suit the vibe of a chord progression or a concept someone’s brought to the table. It’s a juicier headline if we name and shame, but it’s not fair to the person I’m writing about, especially if they don’t have a similar outlet for a right of reply, and it’s also irrelevant, because my meaning behind a song could be completely different to yours, but that doesn’t make it less valid.” Calum shrugs as he speaks, his tone calm and nonchalant. 

“Makes sense. The music can exist as art, and be open to interpretation, like everything in life. And with this album, and reflecting on your homeland… what does that mean, for you? Because 5SOS have lived almost their entire adult lives overseas, so I know it must be hard to self-determine a cultural identity that’s so strongly linked to somewhere you haven’t lived for so long.” Lizzie asks, munching down another bite of brownie.

Calum cocks his head to the side and rolls his bottom lip into his mouth, and Lizzie feels a lump rise in her throat. Had she phrased the question wrong? Was he mad? Had she struck a nerve? Fuck. 

“Sorry, we don’t have to - I mean, we can keep discussing the album in a different way if you’d prefer -” Lizzie started babbling, and she froze when Calum reached across the table and rested on hers reassuringly. 

“Breathe, Lawson. I just need a minute to think about a deep and meaningful response to your question. You’re fine.” Calum was speaking softly, and there was an apology of sorts in his eyes when Lizzie glanced over at him. She was about to ask him something else, when a waitress came over to check on how everything was going with their orders and offered a second round of coffees and Calum withdrew his hand from the table as he ordered another iced coffee to go, times two. 

“If you could have it ready to go in about an hour, that’d be great.” Calum flashed the waitress a smile, and she shot him a wink as she headed back to the counter to update his order.

“A whole ‘nother hour? You spoil me, Mr Hood.” Lizzie joked, downing the last of her coffee and desperately hoping to avoid any awkwardness in her remaining interview time with Calum. 

“Anything for a fellow Australian, mate. To answer your question, it’s strange, because yes I’ve never lived there full time as an adult, but there’s something about your home country and your hometown that stays with you, no matter where you go or how long you’re gone. Obviously, for me, my sister lives overseas, and neither of my parents were raised in Australia, but it still means a lot to me, because it’s home, you know? The industry there is… interesting, but I still think that if we didn’t have the background we all have as individuals and the band, there’s certainly a lot of decisions we’ve made and ways we’ve gone about things in our careers that are heavily influenced by our upbringings and the mindsets we all have from that experience.” 

“Home is where the heart is, right?” Lizzie offers, thumbing her notebook absently. 

“It’s true. But it’s also refreshing to go back and escape it all a bit, you know? None of my friends at home really give a shit about Calum from 5SOS. They just like hanging out with Cal, which is nice.” Calum shrugs, clasping his hands together on the table in front of him.

“Just Cal? Not cool guy Cal? C Dizzle Swizzle?” Lizzie bit back a grin, remembering the multitude of nicknames Cal had garnered over the years.

“Look, cool guy Cal is just my constant state of being. C Dizzle might make an appearance if I’ve had one too many, but either way, they’re just happy to see me. Or happy to tell me some home truths that I haven’t heard, or wanted to hear, so that’s important too. You can’t live in LA for as long as we have without having a good support crew to keep us grounded, you know? Even if some of the ones who mean the most to us are on the other side of the planet.” There was something in Calum’s eyes again as Lizzie looked at him, and she could tell it was more than what he was trying to say for the sake of the profile interview. 

She swallowed down one final bite of the heavenly brownie, and turned the page to find her next question. Lizzie couldn’t entertain the idea of asking Calum why Michael was mad at her, because it would break the air of professionalism she was desperate to maintain; also, she wasn’t entirely sure he’d even tell her. Calum and Michael had been inseparable in their school days, and Lizzie knew that their bond and sense of loyalty no doubt ran even deeper now than then, given all of their shared experiences, trials and tribulations to date. But Calum had always been so kind and patient with her, whether she’d accidentally ruined their Year 9 science experiment, or she’d nearly thrown up on his shoes at the Year 11 formal after party, or when Michael had stormed out of the studio a few days ago and he offered her his time for the first solo interview. Lizzie brushed off the train of thought, and continued with her interview questions for Calum.

The conversation flowed easily, and Lizzie could already feel the profile starting to come together in her mind. She jotted down a handful of notes on how to adapt her questions for Luke and Ashton based on Calum’s responses, and before they realised how long they’d been chatting, the waitress returned with Calum’s two takeaway iced coffees. 

Lizzie asked the waitress for the bill, but Calum waved her off. 

“I’ve got it, Lizzie. Don’t stress.” 

“But I can expense it! I have a receipts app, and everything!” Calum laughed at how excited Lizzie seemed at the concept of submitting a work expense claim.

“Okay, fine. You win this round.” 

Lizzie pressed stop on her phone recording, and reached for her bag to slide her notebook in. The waitress returned with the bill, and Lizzie handed her travel bank card over, drumming her hands absentmindedly on the table while she waited for the waitress to come back with her card and the receipt. 

“Lizzie?” Her head snapped up as Calum spoke. 

“He’s not… I know it seems like he’s really mad at you, but he’s not.” It took a moment for Lizzie to register what Calum was saying.

“He’s not mad at me? He refused to speak to me and stormed out of the room the first chance he got, but he’s not mad? Right.” Lizzie couldn’t help but sound bitter as she spoke.

“I can’t speak for him, but I know him. He’s not mad, he’s just hurt about everything.” Lizzie could tell Calum was being very careful with his choice of words, and she eyed him curiously across the table.

“What does he possibly have to be hurt about? He’s the one that -” Lizzie catches herself halfway through her sentence, and squeezes her eyes shut as she inhales deeply.

“Here’s your receipt and your card back, miss. Thanks so much for visiting us today, have a lovely day!” Lizzie blinks and squints up at the waitress, who hands back her card and a paper receipt. Lizzie mumbles her thanks, and goes to stand up and slide out of the booth, and Calum follows her out of the café.

“Lizzie, I didn’t mean to upset you -” Calum’s apologetic tone had Lizzie spinning on her heel to face him once they’re through the doors of the café. 

“You didn’t, Calum. It’s fine. I’m here to do a job, and I appreciate your time today, I really do. Michael and I… I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it, okay? I know it won’t be easy, but for now, I just want to focus on getting the best interview content I can from you all. That’s why I’m here.” Lizzie wrings her hands nervously, and she can feel how sweaty her palms are.

“Is that the only reason you’re here?” Calum’s tone isn’t teasing, or harsh. It’s genuine, curious, soft. He’s not moving as he stands in front of Lizzie and gazes down at her from his full height. 

Before Lizzie can answer, Calum’s phone starts to ring, and he casts her another glance before stepping away to answer it. While he’s chatting to whoever’s on the other end of the line, Lizzie decides to order herself an Uber and make her way back to the hotel so she can make a start on transcribing the interview with Calum. Because that was why she was here, Lizzie told herself in her head, stubbornly. Didn’t matter about the feelings in her stomach, and the tightness of her chest. She was there to write a profile about a band, nothing more, nothing less. 

“I’ve got to go and meet Ash at the studio, are you all good from here?” Calum’s question broke Lizzie out of her internal dialogue. 

“Yep, all good. Thanks again for your time, Cal. I really appreciate it. I think it’s going to be a great piece, and I’m intrigued to see what comes out of the other interviews. All of them.” Lizzie’s pointed tone isn’t lost on Calum, and he grimaces slightly at the fire he seems to have ignited. Ah well. Lizzie and Michael had to sort their shit out sooner or later, right?

Right? 

Calum was trying to convince himself as he strolled down the street towards his car, pondering if he’d made things better or worse between Michael, his best mate through almost his entire life, and Lizzie, the girl that he’d been sure Michael would love forever, but had walked away from in a shadow of hurt, betrayal, and disbelief. The girl that apparently had no idea Michael felt that way, or that if he did, it wasn’t justified. Someone’s side of the story just wasn’t adding up, but Calum wasn’t sure whose it was. Not anymore.

Taglist: If there’s a line through your name, I couldn’t tag you, so please message me to let me know your new URL or what the go is!  @suchalonelysunflower @blackbutterfliescal @redrattlers @loveroflrh @spicycal @notinthesameguey @metalandboybands @cheekysos @ashton-trash  @another-lonely-heart @queenalienscherrypie  @becihadshawn  @allthestarsandthemoon​ @wheniminouterspace​

[iamtheblondestblonde]

Slides and Serendipity

Part 7 (4.2k)

Masterlist

Warnings: Broken heart for Bennguin shippers, (slightly, I’m talking veeeery slightly implied sexual content like it’s nothing explicit?) and also language

My hangover thankfully wasn’t as bad as I’d anticipated, probably because I stayed clear of wine this time. I even woke up earlier than I’d anticipated but that was only due to Yogi jumping on my bed. How I’d managed to carry him up the stairs without falling while also half asleep would forever remain a mystery unsolved.

I checked my phone to go look at the pictures from last night but then I saw a text from Tyler, asking if I was ready for breakfast yet. In my sleep deprived state I’d completely forgotten about his invitation from last night. I told him I’d be over in a few and then hopped under the shower, something I’d skipped last night because I’d been afraid that I’d fall asleep while standing up.

Whenever I went out I usually only drank until I had a good buzz going but last night I guess I hadn’t stopped early enough so the alcohol had practically knocked me out as soon as I was outside. 

After changing the bed sheets to get rid of the smell of clubbing I finally made my way over, Yogi excitedly bouncing ahead. Tyler’s dogs were howling as soon as I rung his doorbell which of course made Yogi even more excited. I was a bit anxious to see if he would tried to bring up my not so subtle move from last night. While having him strip me down to my underwear had sounded like a great idea last night, I had probably taken it a bit too far in hindsight.

“Hey, no skates today?”, Tyler greeted me and I reached up to hug him while Yogi was running around him, effectively tying him up. He was wearing a hoodie with grey shorts that made it really hard to look anywhere else and I was really tempted to make fun of the way he’d pulled up his socks too high.

“Nope and I already regret it, he has way too much energy right now.” I tried my best to untangle the leash from Tyler’s legs but now his labs were there too demanding attention and it was just one big chaotic mess. Four dogs was a bit much at times like this but I eventually managed to get everything back under control, Tyler hadn’t made an attempt to help me at all and had instead only laughed at my struggle. Yogi and Gerry disappeared together into the backyard and Cash hopped up on the couch while Marshall stayed by my side.

“Are you hoping I’ll make you some breakfast Marsh?”

“He’s not the only one you know.” Tyler’s pout was cute, an adjective that I never thought would fit a guy like him. He was probably the only guy in the world that managed to look adorable and sexy at the same time and it was really distracting.

“What if I only came over so you could make me grilled cheese tho?”

“Then I’ll gladly oblige your wish, ma’am.”

I threw Yogi’s collar at him for calling me ma’am but of course he caught it before it hit his face like it was supposed to. Stupid fast reflexes.

“One more ma’am and I’ll never make food for you again”, I threatened with my finger pointed at him and I could see that it cost him his last bit of self-control to not respond with a ‘yes ma’am’. The salute he gave me in turn wasn’t any better.

“I was actually planning on making something else but I need to check if you have all the stuff for it first because your grocery shopping is anything but top notch.”

He complained to Marshall about me only ever insulting him but Marshall followed me to the step as I walked into the kitchen, not caring about the little crisis his dad was having at all.

For being a pro athlete his fridge and pantry were terribly stocked and it reminded me of the time I spent in the college dorms. The amount of beer in his fridge was equivalent to a frat house and the only thing missing to complete the college student life were the instant ramen cups.

“You should be glad that the nutritionists an trainers don’t visit your house”, I scolded him. He had some fresh produce around but not nearly as much as I’d liked. As I kept pulling out stuff the pile on his kitchen island kept growing after I finally decided on omelette with some avocado toast. The avocadoes were at the tipping point of being too ripe and I didn’t want them to go to waste.

“Well I’m sorry that my kitchen doesn’t look like a Whole Foods ad the way yours does. As soon as the season starts up again I’ll either be gone or eat the majority of my meals at the rink like most of the guys so I don’t see why I should stock up.”

He did have a point but to me a homecooked meal beat everything, even if cooking for just one person was always a bit of a hassle that always resulted in leftovers. Since my move I had been living on my own for the very first time ever and I had to admit that I missed cooking for other people as well.

“Well I’m teaching you how to make the perfect omelette today anyway. You really need to learn to take better care of you and your body.” I made him help me chop stuff to put in the omelette and instantly felt reminded of all the times I’d tried to teach Lisa to cook. She’d been hopeless as well but as soon as we moved off campus during our sophomore year I’d took her under my wing, making a decent cook out of her by the time we moved to Denver. I was convinced I could do the same with Tyler.

He knew how to handle a knife at least and while he mixed everything together I took care of the avocadoes and tomatoes. I tested what he remembered from my spice lesson, letting him make suggestions as to what could go well with our food and he did better than expected, only messing up once.

“No no no you need to turn down the heat or you’ll burn it before the eggs are done”, I said and quickly reached around him so I could reach the stove and save our breakfast. He looked so determined with the spatula in his hand, I knew that he really wanted to do well and was trying his best.

He had put on a snapback a while ago so his hair wouldn’t fall in his face and I already missed his messy bedhead. Without produce his hair looked so soft and all over the place and I really wanted to run my hands through it as much as I could. He really was a walking temptation and every time we spent time together I could feel my resolve weaken.

After everything was done I tried to tell Tyler that the presentation of the food was important as well but he took a bite out of his toast before I was even done putting the tomatoes on it. Sighing I grabbed my plate and walked outside so we could enjoy our breakfast in the sun. I still managed to sneak a picture of our plates before Tyler proceeded to eat his food at a speed that shouldn’t be possible.

I was nervous to meet this Jason guy because I really really hoped that our dynamic would work out. I had looked up some more people that I could meet over the next few days but I really wanted to trust Mia’s judgement.

I even had the cleaning lady come over yesterday so every surface in my house was shining and I’d done some last-minute decorating in the office. My degrees were now on the wall, the online Master of Software Engineering not as pretty as the undergrad degree in computer science from MIT but I still didn’t regret taking online classes instead of real ones. My success during college had given me lots of opportunities that I would forever be grateful for, one of them being the job offer to Denver straight out of college. The experience I had gathered over the last three years working was better than anything I could be taught in stuffy classrooms.

Mia arrived a bit before Jason and this way she’d be there to introduce us properly. It was good to have some one-on-one time with her while we waited, something we’d never really had. Since we didn’t study together Lisa and I would usually only see her when going out or meeting up in groups but it was nice to actually have normal conversations with her.

I didn’t want to create a stiff office atmosphere which is why I was now dressed in jeans and a nice top. Mia was wearing a summer dress and Jason had put on a button up but still managed to look casual. Yogi was sniffing him curiously before plopping down on his bed in the living room again, deciding that this was beneath his attention.

We shook hands and I led them to the office while starting some casual conversation. My desk was already set up and Mia had already told me her hardware preferences so there was some stuff waiting for her which she inspected while I talked to Jason. The conference table really came in handy at this part.

He was funny and gave off a pretty chill vibe but I still had to see some references because unlike with Mia I had no idea if he was any good at what he did.

He was good, better than expected and a while later I was sold on him. He seemed happy with what I was willing to pay and character wise he was a perfect fit for the team. I told them both about the requests I had already lined up and they both seemed super excited to start.

“So you think you can start next Monday?”, I asked after I’d finally satisfied my curiosity and his face lit up as if he thought I wouldn’t offer him the job.

The three of us moved towards the kitchen to get something to drink because all of this talking had made us thirsty. Mia was just telling me that she’d come over tomorrow with Elias after picking him up from daycare when I heard my front door open.

“Hey sorry I kept texting you but you didn’t respond and it’s already half past two so I thought I’d check up on you.” It took a few seconds before Tyler’s words registered with me. I hadn’t even realized that it had gotten this late and that I was supposed to meet up with him half an hour ago to go roller skating with him and Yogi. He walked into the living room and then did a double take when he saw all of us lingering by the kitchen island.

“Oh shit you have company.. I’m sorry but uh hey everyone I’m Tyler”, he introduced himself and waved at Mia and Jason with one hand, a pair of skates in the other. Only now did Yogi wake up from his nap and as soon as he realized what was happening he ran over to Tyler who was now crouching down so he could pet him.

“Holy shit you’re Tyler Seguin! This day just keeps getting better and better”, Jason exclaimed, almost spitting out the sip of water he’d just taken.

“Tyler who?”, Mia asked then and I had to laugh. She had never been interested in watching sports and it was nice to see that nothing had changed in that department at least.

Tyler was still awkwardly standing in the living room and I walked over to give him a hug before turning around to explain to Mia that he was a hockey player for the Dallas Stars and also my friend. At least she’d heard of the team name before. I introduced Mia and Jason as my new team to Tyler and Jason shook his hand excitedly before congratulating him on his amazing last season.

“I know you’ll do even better this year”, Jason said and I was pretty sure that I was the only one that had caught Tyler wincing at the statement. He’d told me how much the expectations of the fans and the rest of the team really weighed on him even if people only meant well.

After Mia and Jason had left Tyler tried to apologize for interrupting again but I wouldn’t let him. It was my fault that I’d forgotten to check my messages for well over three hours so really it was my turn to apologize.

I ate a quick snack before grabbing my roller skates and Yogi and then we were out the door. Even if Yogi was still too small to pull Tyler, he’d told me that he still wanted him to come with us when we had talked about going skating.

We skated around the neighborhood, Yogi’s leash loose in my hand while we made some casual conversation.

It turned out that pulling Tyler was harder than it looked, not because of his weight but because grabbing his hand didn’t leave much space between us to gain the momentum or speed that was needed.

“Your arms are so short. The next time we do this I’m putting a leash on you as well”, Tyler joked and I tried to hit him but of course he simply swerved until he was out of my reach. He was surprisingly graceful for a guy his size.

Sometimes he’d take Yogi’s leash to try and outrun him on the skates but despite his impressive speed he was no match for my husky mix. After I’d taken way too many videos and they managed to tire each other out we made our way back to my house.

“Hey so you know I’m leaving for camp Thursday afternoon but I’m having an end of summer party on Wednesday over at my place and you should come too”, he said as we were skating up my driveway. I could tell that he was really excited, both for camp and the party.

“Of course I’ll come. Do you want me to bring anything?”

“No you don’t need anything I’ve got it covered. Most of the guys from the team are going to be there and some close friends so you’ll have the girls to keep you company as well.”

Tyler wasn’t lying when he said that his place would be packed. The weather wasn’t too spectacular today so nobody was in the pool, making the house and backyard seeming even more crowded. He’d told me to bring Yogi as well, seeing as there wouldn’t be any super loud music tonight and as soon as I had him off the leash he was walking around the room, basking in the attention.

The girls spotted me before I could even look for Tyler and pushed a drink at me before we caught each other up on the last few days. They were really interested in what had happened with Tyler after he had picked me up from the club and it took me several tries until I had finally convinced them that there wasn’t really any tea to spill. I was introduced to even more wives and girlfriends and I was happy to get to know everyone, having always been a social butterfly.

I finally spotted him across the living room and excused myself to go say hello.

“No bikini today?”

“No it’s too cold to go swimming today.”

“That’s too bad because I really like what happened last time in the pool.”

Before I could even respond to his flirty remark I was being dragged away from him and towards the beer pong table that was set up on the outdoor patio. I was glad I’d brought a sweater with me this time. The dogs were chasing each other around the pool but even they didn’t feel like going into the water today.

“I need a rematch to make up for last time”, Roope said after finally letting go of me, settling on the other side of the table with Rads.

“Two on one? That hardly seems fair”, I pouted and tried to get Dobby to join my team as he was closest but he just laughed at me and refused, sitting back on a chair to watch instead.

“Let me help her drink at least”, Tyler insisted from behind me and I hadn’t even noticed that he stood so close to me until he spoke up

“No need to play hero Segs, you know the girl can drink”, Rads said and gave Tyler a stern look until he backed off with his hands raised in surrender. I had to smile at the compliment, a Russian being impressed by your drinking skills was serious business. I sighed as I realized that there was no getting out of this and cracked my knuckles to get ready. I needed to make this a quick win because I noticed that they’d filled my cups a bit more than usual and I really didn’t want to drink this much beer before dinner.

We had gathered quite the crowd over the course of the game that was now witness to me absolutely destroying the two of them. They had only managed to hit two cups of mine while I was on my second try to make the last shot so I would win after some double scores. The girls were cheering on me while their boyfriends were supporting their teammates. With each point that I’d made the chirping had increased and now neither of us three could make a move without there being screaming from all sides. I only knew a few words in Russian and had no clue about Finnish but even I could tell that whatever was coming out of my opponents’ mouths was anything but pretty.

“You got this Liv, show ‘em how it’s done!”, Katie yelled and I blew her a kiss.

“You better miss”, Jamie said, which earned him a light punch to his shoulder from his girlfriend. I closed my eyes for a second to concentrate and then made my shot.

Groans and high pitched screams rose as the ball tipped into the cup, making me the winner. I was hugged from multiple people at once and Tyler lifted me to spin me around. He was the only one from the team that had been on my side.

“How are you so good at this?”, Roope asked, his accent stronger because of the frustration. Tyler was smirking down at me, probably thinking of the time he’d asked me the same question.

“I take in the wind and the distance to calculate the perfect throwing angle.”

“Really?”, Rads now asked, his eyes big.

“No, you guys just suck.”

Tyler had asked some people to man the grill and we didn’t have to wait long until the delicious smell of steaks was wafting around the property, which I was thankful for because I had been looking forward to this part all day. I grabbed some food and sat with the girls, resuming our discussion on which potato form was the best. Wedges, obviously.

After dinner some people left and everyone else proceeded to get even more drunk. I could tell that this was the last time that the guys would be able to really relax because they had all kinds of stupid ideas. At some point Tyler had taken off his shirt and while I certainly wasn’t complaining about the view I still had to laugh at him taking whatever chance he got to strip. Perhaps a trade to the Golden Knights would allow him to flourish in this side business. Jamie was the most fun to watch because with every drink he got less and less shy until Tyler and him were running around the house laughing their asses off and jumping on each other.

“Bennguin is real, get used to it”, Katie commented with a sigh and her exasperated expression had me laughing so hard that I had to put my drink down so I wouldn’t spill it all over the couch we were currently on. I could only imagine the amount of shit she’d had to put up with because of these two acting like children.

“I want to play a gameeee”, Tyler whined and I already knew that nothing good come out of the look he was giving his friends. With all the alcohol going around everyone had loosened up and it didn’t take long until I was dragged into a round of ‘never have I ever’ on the floor of Tyler’s living room.

“You guys didn’t go to college and it really shows”, Katie commented and I had to agree with her. We’d made it our personal mission tonight to make as much fun of Tyler and Jamie as possible. I’d played the stupid game so many times, usually at frat parties so they could expose the virgins but I also couldn’t wait to see what I could learn about these big dumb idiots.

The first few questions were timid and I could tell that everyone was still trying to figure out how far everyone was willing to go to expose their secrets, especially with some of the partners present, but every new statement pushed further.

“Never have I ever had a threesome.”

I didn’t even pay attention to who had said it, going around the circle having long been abandoned in favor of someone randomly throwing in questions.

Even though I had been absolutely plastered that night, I still remembered this particular event, one of the very few one night stands that I’d ever had. We’d started day drinking even before breakfast on a boat off the shore of Ibiza and while I wasn’t even into girls, lots of shots and pitchers filled with sangria had led to me tangled in the bed sheets with some hot guy that I didn’t even remember the name of and Lisa. The guy didn’t really know what to do with the both of us at the same time, so we had to get creative and I’d vowed to myself that I would stick to guys after, scarred for life.

As I raised my cup to my lips I noticed that Tyler was about to do the same so I raised my cup towards him in a toast. I only hoped his experience had been better than mine.

“You two are perfect for each other”, Rads said with an eyeroll but I only laughed.

“You had a threesome and this is the first I’m hearing of this?”, Katie yelled from beside me and I turned just in time to see Jamie lowering his cup across the room after having taken a sip.

“Holy shit! Was it with Tyler?”, I asked, knowing full well what was said about them on Tumblr because of Mara. The way both of them visibly recoiled at my words should have been preserved for eternity. Sadly that didn’t happen.

“No! What the fuck Liv?” Tyler’s disturbed exclamation had me leaning on Katie, who was now also shaking with laughter, the news of her boyfriend’s sexual adventures momentarily forgotten.

“Do you hear the sound of millions of Bennguin hearts breaking?”, she asked in between shaky breaths and now we were lying back on the floor, tears threatening to run down my cheeks from laughing so hard.

“I just want to make it clear that I only took a sip because I was thirsty. I wasn’t paying attention and besides you know I would’ve told you babe”, Jamie spoke up after Katie and I had finally calmed down again. The alcohol had made everything ten times funnier than it probably actually was but Katie and I were still clutched together and she only waved at Jamie in dismissal. I would’ve had to reevaluate my people reading skills if he actually had taken part in a threesome because there was no way I could’ve seen that coming.

Our loud cackling must have woken up the dogs from their nap because now Yogi was trying to snuggle up against me while Gerry curiously looked around, probably trying to figure out why there were so many people stretched out on the floor. As soon as Yogi had made himself comfortable with his head on my lap Gerry came over as well, lying down on my legs. There was close to a hundred pounds of dog on top of me but I couldn’t be happier, gently petting them while completely forgetting that we were playing a game at the moment.

Alcohol mixed with cuddly puppies, the greatest thing since long before sliced bread.

Tyler insisted on taking a picture of the three of us all snuggled up and then proceeded to beg until I finally let him post it to his story. Me giving in didn’t come as a surprise, I was this close to doing almost anything he wanted me to after all. I wouldn’t let him tag me though, desperately trying to hold on to the last shred of anonymity , and dignity, that I still had left. 

Part Eight here

[protezioni]

"stop saying i look like chicken little. he’s dumb, and he’s a coward. and i am NOT a coward!" for Maemi/Zuro and "yes, she is a bitch. b i c t … h." for Shima/Ko :3

Yes of course! Thank you for sending this ask and I enjoyed writing it a ton omg Love you!

STAN ZETA @zetacomic !! SOME CHARACTERS THAT WERE SEEN IN THE STORY BELONGS TO THE CREATOR SUCH AS MAEMI AND SHIMA!!!

Zuro/Maemi

Day count of suffering? Still the same. The amount of suffering he feels every day? Increased. Yes, sure- the Protezioni were somewhat like new siblings to them, but he cannot ignore the fact that they could sometimes be as annoying as some other members of Zygos. A lot of the Protezioni members may have been welcoming, and some even encouraged to be close to them--- but as months passed by, he only got to notice how some other members masked their more ridiculous side through acting like such. Well, what was to be expected from them? They may have been in the mafia, but they were certainly like normal people... They acted like a bunch of students who were glad there were no classes tomorrow...

I mean, they even had this movie night where they invited the entirety of Zygos Academy! Where? In their living room! It was easy to tell their place was bigger than the academy... Maybe even too big. Sure, whatever. Everyone was down to watch movies together... But of course, one of the more loud and obnoxious members had to bring something up- Which he, of course, did not expect. Disappointed but not surprised? Absolutely. That was a good summary of how he felt at this exact same moment when someone decided to bring up an inaccurate comparison between him and... a character from the movie. A children's movie. About a chicken discovering aliens existed. How pathetic was that?! Who in their right mind would compare him to that character?!

Maemi was staring at Zuro who was leaning on the couch, with a bowl of Doritos. He munched on the chips as he continued to look at Maemi in the eye. Once he swallowed, he coughed to capture some people's attention. "You sure you aren't Chicken Little?" He wasn't satisfied with Maemi's squinting as an answer, so he only repeated the question. "Chicken Little ain't that bad, Maemi!" Is he seriously trying to tell him that it wasn't bad at all? I mean... who the hell gets compared to a weak chicken who can hardly do shit at first? "You see, there are pros in being that little chick! He's got some cool-looking glasses!"

Maemi sighed, his heads in his hands... Wasn't this supposed to be movie night? Why were they just sitting down in the living room and making theories about how he is just a black feathered Chicken Little who somehow got red eyes? "This whole thing is dumb." Maemi rolled his eyes, refusing to sit beside Zuro who only patted the empty space beside him. "No thank you. I'll rather not stay beside you and be teased during the whole movie." It wasn't that hard to figure out that he would actually do that if he were to sit beside him. There was just a smirk written all over his face once he rejected his offer... What does that mean? "What are you smirking at?"

"Wanna know?"

"I'm curious."

Zuro handed the bowl to Sepheir, who was sitting beside him for the whole time. He cleared his throat for a moment before gesturing to Maemi. "You look like Chicken Little." That was all he said. Nothing less, nothing more. He sighed louder and tugged on his longer bang in annoyance. They were right. This man was someone who always joked around, and he was a little shit. He had enough proof of that as spent a longer time with him... Now that he was aimed at him, he could only understand it better. Of course he'd aim at him.

Shoya began smirking and he nodded in agreement. "Never thought about Mae being Chicken Little until you brought it up, bro!"

"See? Someone agrees with my theories!"

Finally, the strategist responded, irritation obvious in his voice.

"Stop saying I look like Chicken Little. He’s dumb, and he’s a coward. and I am NOT a coward!" There was silence in the room as all eyes landed on Maemi and Zuro... There were some people who laughed, some people who agreed, some others disagreed and some people only looking at the scenario before them. That was a weird line to say, but it sounded way too familiar... Was it from those Kine videos? Kine was deleted some years ago! Whatever, the scenario before them was surely interesting to experience... Even if he knew there was a reference to that or not. Now, the people only got more quiet as they noticed how even the two were silent.

"Okay yeah, you're not a coward." Even if Zuro had such a personality, he wouldn't call him a coward. "But--- Chicken Little wasn't a coward by the end of the movie! Therefore, you being Chicken Little? Still valid, I suppose!" He hated the enthustiastic grin which was still on the face of his even if he said those words. Goddamn it- did he have to diagree with this man forever? He won't even budge! You know what? What's the point of arguing with him if it would definitely lead to nothing at all. He wouldn't change. "Got anything else to say?" He crossed his arms with a playful chuckle, while Maemi just began picking a book from the shelf.

He got a book, schemed through the pages to see how long it was then decided to read it. He placed the book slightly higher so the person could read the title of the book he was reading... His face was clearly done with Zuro's bullshit, and he had no ideas how to respond to him so he could finally drop the Chicken Little subject. Zuro only read the book with his eyes before bursting into laughter. "Did you get the message, or should I get another book?" His voice was passive agressive in a way, but he didn't sound mad at all.

"I don't know, Maemi. Why are Little Shits such blockheads is a good enough title."

Shima/Ko

They were waiting for the rest of the members of the BQ Thieves inside the restaurant itself. Shima was casually eating the burger, enjoying the coupons which he got from Aki after saying some words to someone... It wasn't that big of a deal... I mean, what could get better than some coupons to one of his favorite restaurants? He took another bite from the burger and he noticed how Ko was just sipping some coke float from his straw as he dipped his fries on ketchup-- but his mind didn't seem to be with him right now. "Hey, Morga--- Ko. Something up?" Jesus Christ, he almost called him by that chatacter from his favorite game. No answer from him. "Ko?" He repeated his name and Ko jumped up from his seat.

"I apologize for not noticing you sooner, Shima." He laughed nervously as he finally began to eat... Damn, what the hell was wrong? He usually spoke more than usual, and his topics ranged from tips, things about himself, mafia life or questions about how Zygos really works... Now he was more silent than usual. "I began to think about other things, I should have paid attention to my surroundings." He personally apologized and Shima placed the wrapper of the burger away before placed his arms on top of the table. This only caused the man who was still eating his fries to only observe what he was doing and wonder what his movements meant.

He didn't remember being this caring, or at least- he didn't remember showing his kindess so easily. But well, being more of a protagonist could be fun! There were bonus positive feelings that made him feel proud of himself, so there's that. "Want to talk about it?" His face was bland for a second before he looked away for a short moment. "I mean, we still have the others to wait for, and we don't really have anything else to do..." He tried to make up several excuses to hide that he may have been a bit worried for the male he was eating with... And well, his words did work. Hell yeah, protagonist powers always worked.

"Thank you for understanding, Shima. But I prefer not talking about this specific person in public. All I have to say is I feel pretty upset over the fact she did so much and she had no warning signs." Ko's eyes suddenly became a bit sad. "She has broken several members, but they all chose to forgive or forget her. In my case, it isn't easy to do that if she..." Woah Ko, that's going to spoiler territory... "... Yeah. Anyway, why I am like this is because I decided to go to the attic and see if there are any objects I could have used for training, but instead, I gained some unwanted memories and it's been affecting me." He closes his eyes before raising a finger. "But perhaps I could forget about it, people can be much more deceiving than you expect they are."

"Yeah, people can be bitches sometimes."

"Agreed."

"And deceiving? Holy crap, I should tell you about how one of my teammate can go from "I'm cute" to "die" real quick. That's fucking deceiving."

Ko laughed a bit, knowing who he was talking about. "Go ahead, hearing your stories would certainly be interesting.

"You see..." Shima began trying to look for an explanation before placing his hands on top of the table. "One time, I said something out loud by accident and the next time I knew it, Hamlet was dramatically crying over my supposedly dead corpse as he wrapped bandages around my room." One out of the many experiences with someone from Team Omega. "Then later on, I knew Haru did it. Who else could have done it? I was fucked up with a damn knife. Just for saying shit out loud by accident." Shima shivered at the mere flashback he had with his head and it ended up making Ko burst out in laughter.

"I know who that is... I have to admit, she is fairly pretty. But as people in Zygos act, she is also deadly." He began wiping his hands with a tissue. "She's injured you, as I've heard. Also, you have a story about her so there's that. She gave Sepheir more work that one time she stabbed Ace... She truly is a wild woman." He recalled some moments he had with her, and he admitted that she wasn't someone who he talked to a lot--- but through other people he knew how she acted. "Indeed, her looks may deceiving... But I cannot fully deny that I am quite attracted to her--- Wait no, more of curiousity than attraction." Ko brought this up and Shima only placed his two hands on his shoulder like a main character from an anime.

"You wouldn't want to be curious or attracted to her."

"Oh?"

"I don't want to attend to a cat's- I mean, person's funeral."

"Is she that much of a bitch to be able to hurt someone like me?"

"Yes, she is a bitch. B i c t … h." Shima began shaking hkm slightly, as if he was trying to snap out Ko from a dream. "Did you not hear me? She almost killed me! Not only once, so that makes you not a single chance to be protected by her wrath. I don't want you to die." He finally released him before sighing. "Fuck. Why the hell do you Protezioni have some guts to be close to someone so fucking dangerous? She can probably bite your head off." A chuckle from the person he was talking to. "I'm fucking serious! She can! She's like the dam Hulk!" He began to tall about hlw she worked again. "Decent and all until she gets fucking angry!"

"Thank you for the warnings, maybe I will stop being curious." Ko said this calmly as he only continued to sip his soda. This conversation was wild, talking about girls was... surely a topic to to enjoy. Hey, at least he got to enjoy this moment because of him. If not, the whole BQ Thieves could have found him all upset over something that shouldn't even be brought up. "Additionally, thank you for talking to me about such..." His words trailed off to something else as a smirk was seen on his face. "Joker." It was a complete reference to a game Shima played and he only felt the success sharpen in his mind.

"Mission Accomplished."

"That's right... I should call you that again sometimes."

"WHAT A WONDERFUL TIME TO SEE MT DEAREST FRIENDS IN SUCH A PLACE FILLED WITH DIFFERENT PEOPLE AND AROMAS---"

"Sorry, we were late!! I and Ren stopped in a flower shop, we bought a bouquet."

"Yarohe and Ren decided to look at the flowers and Ren posed as she read the name of the flowers out loud. It was funny to watch!"

"About time you all came... We should order shit again... MOVE OUT!"

[dyingunknown-blog]

BEGINNINGS + GENDER

As said in the introduction: this is a selfish blog where I rant about myself and my feelings. Here goes my first ramble. Within this ramble contains bits of: gender, femininity,  sexuality and eating disorders. Y’know, the usual mix of edgy Tumblr content. I am posting this in celebration of Pride Month (!!! YAY!!! I HONESTLY LOVE PRIDE MONTH) but also because I’ve had this build up in my heart for too long. 

A NOTE BEFORE I BEGIN...

I know you (reader) cannot hear me doing this, so imagine me (author) taking a deep breath, filling my semi spacious lungs, and releasing all that pent up air with a heavy sigh. 

Here we fucking go. Here’s to tip of the iceberg, from 4 years of pent up gay shit to recent moments of gentle gender dysmorphia. Do not expect my writing to be fully coherent, nor written in the best grammar. I am writing for my own therapeutic needs, because I gotta get some of this energy released and I have nowhere else to dump this. This piece is a full on rant, as in I literally wrote this angrily tapping away at 2-4 am. However, I’d like to mention that I mean no offence to any parties, and simply want to vent out some of the deep thoughts I’ve been pacing around for the past few years. Feel free to send me a message regarding your personal feelings, or to just chat. I’m always here as a friend and listener <3 

WHERE IT ALL BEGAN...

I think I owe myself and you (reader) an explanation on where things began to really start. The main “spark” that got me going and prompted me to start this blog was when I found myself unable to stop playing songs by Dorian Electra. Actually-- to be honest-- it was the music videos that really got me going. The glorious explosion of just “QUEER” screaming and banging its head at my 13 inch Mac Book Pro got me extremely inspired to actually do something about the gross reactions of confusion that were occurring in my brain and body. As Dorian Electra put it, “You know I’m not straight, but I’m gonna give it straight to you.” So here’s my best shot at “giving it straight.” 

By the way... I’m from a fairly traditional family with high hopes for me, so the most freedom I can really grasp onto is starting an anonymous Tumblr blog at 2 am laying naked with just my underwear on. 

PERSONAL TOPIC 1: GENDER...

So here’s the thing, I stick to my biological birth gender like it’s my lifeline-- my comfort zone-- I guess, if anything. I personally feel like gender and sexuality have their own little symbiotic (or perhaps parasitic???) relationship, where one’s gender impacts their sexuality-- but I can also accept that my understanding is probably not politically correct. I can say, however, with a heavy heart: 

I am utterly fucked when I think about my gender and sexuality. 

I’ll take it easy first and rope down my feelings towards my gender and its definition. I jokingly scream in the halls that gender is a social construct, but let’s be honest-- is it not?  Other than our dongle-longs and hoochie-has, what makes a woman different from a man? I mean maybe it is just the sausage and the grapefruit, but I’d like to argue that... Just kidding, the more I think about it the more I fall into a rabbit hole where I can’t figure out what a male is and what a female is. I mean what are they? Is it based off of the definition I provide for myself, or what society conveniently slams into my face? Is the LGBTQ+ community the people who get to decide or is it the Westboro Baptist Church??? 

Note: these are not a rhetorical question, please answer this to your opinion because I’m in desperate need of some kind of direction beyond biology. I accept all ideologies and concepts. I’m just hella confused. 

Ehem.

Anyways, my own battle with gender goes beyond not knowing where the “line” is, or if it even exists (again, I’m still not sure if this is a personal question or something based on society...) It also goes into where I stand on this polarised scale. See-- I have a bean, a hole, and melons. Alas, in slightly more proper terms, I have a clitoris, vagina and breasts. So what does that mean for me? Am I automatically a woman? For the first 17 years of my life, I would respond to that question with a VERY confident nod. Pink was once my favourite colour, I like boys, dresses, cute animals and romcoms. My physical body only went to assure what I already knew. Now? I’m not so sure. As it is more acceptable nowadays to be “queer,” I’ve slid into the an identity crisis where I realise I’ve never revelled in the fact that I had tiddies, nor felt comfortable about having a coochie. I used to blame my confusion regarding my comfort in my biological gender on the growing queer influences in my life-- after all, everyone wants to be special and sometimes being apart of the LGBTQ+ community is the best way to stand out, especially when it’s being shoved in your face with media. Everyone who comes out of the closet is faced with incredible amounts of love and attention, and my younger self thought “maybe I should get on the boat” hence, labelling myself as bisexual for the longest time without truly feeling like I am (until in recent years.)  I blamed my confusion in identity and sexuality on the attention whore who lived inside of my heart. My feelings were only justified as true this year, when I found myself staring at myself in the mirror and couldn’t help but to feel unhappy with what I presented myself with. Undies clad with a slightly cropped black muscle tank, I could see the linings of a “V” line on my lower abdomen and felt kinda hot about it. I did the annoying fuckboy pose (you know, the one where the guy is biting his shirt to reveal his oh-so-humble six pack) and found it... kinda fun? I did have a 36D underboob flail around, but my focus was more on my bottom half, with my Victoria Secret blue lace underwear and masculine illusion.  It wasn’t like a grand glorious moment, nor was it like I was the tomboy of the house and everyone just “knew” and I only had to convince myself. Instead, it was an anti-climatic moment where I realised “fuck, I have another problem on my hands that I can’t ignore anymore.” 

I don’t know if I truly identify as female or male. Honestly, I don’t really think I need to identify myself, but that’s the 30% of my consciousness who is super queer, chill and cool. See, the other 70% of my mind is going in a frenzy screaming, because I just lost one of my key defining attributes. Think that episode of Spongebob, where Spongebob’s brain cells are screaming and throwing papers around the office setting of his brain.

Another question has also become increasingly relevant in my journey of finding my “true inner zen self.” 

Who am I choosing my gender for?

In 2018, and most of the years before, I adored being loved by boys and having guys waggle their dicks like dog tails for my tits and ass, but in 2019, I randomly figured out that I never liked my boobs for anything but that. I mean having an hourglass figure was always (and still is) a goal of mine, but I question for what reason. I’d like to say it’s for personal aesthetic appeal, but it wouldn’t be surprising to me if I just do it so people will like me more. In fact, I battled with bulimia for the very reason of: I don’t know what the fuck I want or like, but  the crowd likes “skinny thick” girls so lets do that by purging. Am I currently wearing a waist trainer and corset on top of each other because I like the outcome, or because the people around me like me more for it? I’m trying really hard not to segue into the alluring topic of toxic femininity, because I can rant for HOURS AND PAGES about that, so I’ll just say: I don’t know if I’m being a girl for myself or because I’ll be more liked for it. 

In all honesty, the truth regarding my gender became clearer the more I self conscious I became. In 2018, I fell into the trap of sending boys nudes (apologies for the TMI and sorry family if you somehow came across my blog and are currently reading this.)  I liked it for a millisecond. Why? Because it felt good to have someone desperate for me. That millisecond died off real fast. My own thoughts pooped my nude Alpha Female party with insecurity and fear of how my body compares to other girls my age. Three days after the first nude I sent I realised I hate my body. I felt empowered in the moment (honestly I do love the feeling of tease. I still do send ohohoho raunchy pics for the pure euphoria of just having someone crave me) but overall just left the experience with lingering guilt and self hatred. I wasn’t sure if I was doing this to please myself or others. I also abhor taking nudes, because I do not think I embody femininity and dislike my body for that very reason. Identifying as male makes me far more comfortable than as identifying as a female. I might have tits, I might have soft facial features, but I just don’t like how I mentally feel like I can’t compare to the unrealistic standard of femininity that women uphold. I spent my whole life trying to  tick the boxes under “female,” but always felt like I was just doing the bare minimum... Hence my past is full of desperation, the need to show skin for the sake of proving I’m “sexy” and being perfectly fine with getting mislabeled as a slut at school. Nowadays, I show skin because I’m comfortable and am learning to love my body. I am not okay with slut shaming in general, but I am most definitely not okay with being called a slut either because I’m still a fucking virgin. So hun, I really do wish I could call myself a slut and have that much game, but I’m very far from that.

Anyways, uh more on my gender crisis:  I’ve also always adored mens fashion and absolutely revel the aura of being the “alpha.” Ever since my middle school days, I’d secretly snoop around and envy the men’s section of Barney’s and Saks, because it just looks so damn cool. Excuse my lack of “high quality language,” I can hear my English teacher sighing about my lack of “professional” or “appropriate” language, but I really can’t express my feelings regarding mens fashion other than it’s fucking cool. I must say though, my style of clothing and expression of self doesn’t stop itself at mens fashion. In fact, I enjoy dressing to exhort a more dominant presence, whether it’s with a short denim skirt and tight crop top or a loose fitting silk blouse and skinny jeans with a belt. So I guess in a way, my fashion and what I feel comfortable in explains my gender for me. A little bit of both and a little bit of neither. Although the next step would definitely be playing around with my hair and piercing, but I think my traditional family would whoop my ass to the moon if I do it now, and I can’t say I’m not scared of regrets. I just want to discover myself a little more this year...

Regardless, I just wanna further clarify that I don’t feel comfortable being put as female, male or hell-- even androgynous.

And I gotta say, after holding this in and denying it for 4 years, it feels damn good to type it out and admit it.

 In deciding to be a “gender”, there are standards. Deciding to be anything comes with the price of standards. I just can’t personally handle not being able to fit into the standards there are for them... Especially now since people are so bothered on being politically correct, so if I’m “not being properly androgynous” or “not properly female,” I’ll get shit on, and if I’m not accepted by the mass majority, I’ll feel societal hate mixed with self hatred. 

I also want to say that sometimes I don’t feel like I have the right to be confused or declare a gender because I’ve been on the judgemental side before. 

In middle school one of my close friends moved away, and soon later began to label themselves as gender fluid. It was such a new concept that I initially thought that they were doing it as a publicity stunt, but slowly realised that it is indeed who they are. I wasn’t hateful, but I can’t say I’m innocent, even if it was when I was far younger and less understanding. I remember when they first started using their current pronouns, I was confused on how to utilise them and initially disregarded them. Today, I regret my ignorance. Misgendering can always be a mistake, but it can also be extremely spoiled, belittling and condescending. So even though I know someone that probably went through a similar journey as I am today, I feel guilty asking them about it because of the shit I gave them when I was 14.

 Additionally, I’m scared of being wrong about myself. I can’t describe it too well, but I’m just scared that I’ll slip up a wrong opinion and then be automatically thrown into the can of “special snowflake wannabe LGBTQ+” when in reality: I truly feel like I’m not of “cisgender” or anything normal. I don’t want to dip too deep into my history with crippling anxiety and experiences with depression, but I will say that I can’t help but to hate myself for being queer too.. Alas, I’ll have to learn how to get over that and continue loving myself, but what the hell am I going to do now? 2k words later and things aren’t exactly clearer, but I can (somewhat) confidently say that I know what I’ll do (for now.) 

As of today, June 17, 2019, I have decided to not give a fuck and to simply just identify with the LGBTQ+ community. I don’t feel comfortable identifying as male, female, neither, both, gender fluid, or anything else. I will simply put off gender and let people call me by whatever pronoun they want.

I just wanna be me. 

Until I find out something else, or become more comfortable with myself, or gather the confidence to “come out of the closet” and stop being so selfish and finally decide what the hell I am, it’ll probably just be like this for awhile.

And honestly? I think I’m okay with that.

[imnotasuperhero]

DAY 3 OF RARE PAIR WEEK IS HERE!!

BIG WARNING!! Beware of mention of PPD. I apologize deeply if this hurts you somehow. It’s not my intention at all. I just wanted to try a different path and I reaaaaally hope that the experiences and the knowledge I’ve got (I’m an outsider) fulfilled the goal. Please, let me know what you think. I had so many emotions (I just got emotional because I’ve got the okay) so I hope you all like it.

Also, big shout out to @mitchsentrash for the support and the encouragement. I owe you, dude.

Pairing: Chacie

Theme: Single parent

Type: Angst? Fluff

Summary: Chloe finds out she's pregnant. Stacie offers her help. Could they win the battle?

Wordcount: 3292

What the fuck would she do now? Scratch that. How the fuck would she do it?

Chloe felt how her world started to become harder every second that passed. She wasn't ready for this. Most importantly, she didn't ask for this. This was a whole other level that she wasn't ready for and she could fuck it up enormously.

For the last half an hour, she's been walking without destination opting for sitting at the nearby park.  Mistake Nº2, she realized. She discovered right there that the world doesn't stop. Time never stops. If that was the case, she'd give anything to make it happen and have a few extra minutes - God knows the idea of years was tempting enough, but no. She should figure how to continue from now on and how she'd manage to take care of a child. Her child.

"Are you okay? Why are you crying?" a sweet little voice spoke in front of her. Reacting to the sound, her hands moved unconsciously to brush the few tears away.

"I'm okay, thank you," she couldn't surprise the smile that formed on her lips.  Before she could continue, what she supposed was the little girl's mom, called her. She watched with tenderness at the little person waving her hand while making her way to her family.

And that's when she decided it. She'll give her baby the best life she could. Happy accident or not, her baby would be so happy that sadness will never reach them. Even if their family were just two, love will always be there. She promised to themselves.

Bringing her hand to her flat stomach, she let herself start to wonder what the future had for her. Would it be a girl? Or perhaps a boy? Oh god, a little Taz running through the house with their happy spark enlighting her life.

"Since when do you stick with water, Ginger?" Amy asked with a curious expression. Oh, shit. Of course, someone would bring it up. That was the reason she almost turned them down for their monthly Bellas' reunion.

"I just had a rough day and I'm not feeling the alcohol," she shrugged the topic off. Her hand going unconsciously to her belly - as it seemed to be a habit now. But the action wasn't missed for everybody. Not for certain leggy brunette, who just started to analyze every movement she did.

"Another stubborn dog?" Emily asked with the giggle of a little kid. "Ohhh, was it a bunny this time?"

"None, Em. Just a bunch of owners that decided to organize and come together to the revision," she smiled at the younger woman.

The night seemed to go great despite a few compromising questions. How she loved these women that she got to call her sisters. She almost blurts out the words during the evening but decided against it at the last minute. It wasn't the right time, not yet.

"You're pregnant," Stacie spoke after some minutes of silence during the car ride. Chloe's head whiplashing in a way that she could have broken her neck. "I've been there, Chlo," she clarified for the redhead.

"I'm scared and excited at the same time," she confessed. Her hands starting to sweat at the inspection of the brunette. "I found out a week ago," she whispered.

"Why didn't you tell me? Or at least Aubrey," the inquisitive look in the younger woman sending shivers through her spine.

"And tell what? 'Oh, you know? I'm pregnant and Chicago doesn't want to know about it'. It isn't easy," she snapped. Regretting it instantly. "I'm sorry."

"No, no. I get it," Stacie looked at her briefly before centering her vision on the road. "You shouldn't go through this alone. You're allowed to ask for help," Chloe tried to find disappointment in them but failed miserably.

"Who? My parents would kill me if they find out. And the girls have their own lives," she opted to lose herself in the window. The street lights casting an orange shadow on her face, making Stacie's faint at the sight.

"Me," the brunette couldn't help it. "I would gladly help you." And Chloe felt her heart jump at the proposal. Her eyes starting to glaze at the menacing tears.

"Would you really help me? But you already have Bella and-"

"Bella is 5 now and she has a father. I can totally mold my schedule to yours. I'll be there for you, Chlo." the smile on her friend's lips melting her instantly. How could she score such a good friend?

And that's how both women embarked on the exciting journey of motherhood. Stacie was always by her side. She even protested -in vain, when Stacie made herself home for the night when Chloe's body was giving her a hard time. God bless the brunette's heart and patience.

At the 5th month, they finally got to see the gender. Both women crying when they found out it was a girl. She was a sparky bundle for sure, making Chloe laugh whenever Stacie decided to talk to the bump. Hell, even Bella wanted to talk to the baby, which she did.

Days passed and with them passed the months. By now, except her inability to walk straight, some back pain and fluid retention, Chloe had it relatively easy. Stacie -firm at her promise, got to go with her to the Lamaze coaching and helped her to master the tips as the pro she was by herself. It literally amazed Chloe how involved Stacie had become in her life; something she treasured deeply.

As the moment of giving birth came closer, even the other Bellas were now buying different items for the baby to come. Beca just wanted Ellie (yes, the music producer had already named her baby) to be as cool as herself so she always would come up with little tiny rock star's outfits. Claiming that she'll be the greatest godmother ever. Something that led them to arguments about who would be the baby's guarantor.

Cloe's heart melted at all the love she was getting from her sisters. Tears were a common thing by now as she observed them take over her place and stopping her from moving unless it was strictly necessary.

"I promise I'm alright, guys. I just want to help with the room," she tried to fight back. "I'm pregnant, not disabled." Aubrey just rolled her eyes.

"You want to help? Keep doing what you do and sit there," the blonde then grabbed one of the decorations an put it on the shelve above the crib.

She loved visits. She really did. But sometimes they were just so much to handle and she just wanted to be useful. A hand placed on her shoulder, making her jump in place only to find it was Stacie.

"Don't worry. I've hidden some so you can place them wherever you want once we're alone" the warm breath on her ear made things to Chloe.

They both had agreed that since the baby was almost here and everything would become pretty hectic, Stacie would move with her as long as she was required. Something that both women learned to live with. Even Bella had her own place to crash the days she was assigned to Stacie.

"STACIE!" a sudden scream woke her from her happy earth. Running to Chloe's room, she found the redhead with blank face and panic evident in it. "The baby is coming," she said as she stared at her wet sheets.

"OH SHIT!" is all the brunette could mutter as she tried to think properly what to do next. Yes, she's been there and it should be a piece of cake for her... but her whole body started to tremble at the knowledge that she'll get to finally meet Chloe's baby. That baby that made her discover another kind of love. "Okay... with calm steps we'll go to the car, yeah?" she made a mental note to grab the baby's bag. "Come up, everything will be alright" she kissed the redhead's temple in an attempt to calm her.

"OH, MY GOD! She's eager to come to the world," Chloe spoke as they made their way to the hospital. Pain starting to show on her face.

"Listen here, little gremlin. You better wait till mommy is with the doctors or I will never ever give you sweets," she spoke firmly as if the baby could understand her. An action that made Chloe laugh bittersweetly. She could imagine the contractions were something very real now. "Remember babe. Deep breaths. In through-"

"I know how to breathe, Stace! Just hurry up, please." she just decided to bite her tongue and tried to drive as fast as she could without putting them in danger.

It wasn't until several hours later that Chloe got to finally start to push. Hell, her hand would definitely need a checkup after this. She could feel something was about to break. And she probably should throw sacred water at Chloe. The redhead didn't stop cursing since the contractions reached the top level; something so-not-Chloe. Where was her sweet kind friend?

"Oh shit! Please take her out already," Chloe had started to cry some minutes ago. Her whole body shaking in pain.

"Breathe, Chloe. You have to help her, okay?" Stacie kissed the top of her head lovingly at the doctor's words. She herself remembering Bella's birth.

"Come on Red. We almost have her with us. You can do it," she started to whisper encouraging words in her ear. Squeezing her hand every now and then. Something that seemed to help the soon-to-be mom.

"I can't, Stace. I won't make it." Chloe cried the words. Her whole body in a fight between rest and deliver her baby.

"Yes, you can! You're so much stronger than this, sweetie," she brushed some wet red locks off her forehead. "Come on, just focus and push matching her timing, yeah? You can definitely make it."

And after what seemed like hours -but was just some more minutes of screams, tears, and words mixed with love and encouragement, a loud new crying sounded in the room. Chloe just gave birth a healthy baby, if her lungs were proof enough about it. Her heart started to beat frantically as she reached forward to see the baby but the squeeze on her hand made her turn her attention to Chloe. "She's alright. You did it perfectly- CHLOE?!" her heart stopped at the sight in front of her. Chloe had just passed out. The monitors around her starting to beep at a different rhythm than before.

As the doctors and nurses started to work on Chloe, she made her walk to the baby. And she was sure she'd need one of those oximeters because her heart's rate was jumping at the mixed emotions. She was trapped between a healthy beautiful baby and a not-so-healthy Chloe. Her Chloe. She asked for all the gods out there and the universe to help Chloe and so the three of them could go home.

"Would you like to take her?" the pediatrician asked Stacie after she'd finished checking up on the baby. "She's a perfect baby," she spoke as Stacie placed the little body on her arms. Tears starting to fall, again.

"Hell, she is," she couldn't help it but to kiss the newborn head. Her heart grew 100 times bigger at that moment. She dreamed about this moment a lot of times, but none of them were like this. She just decided to lost herself in taking care of the baby in order to stop worrying about Chloe. For what the doctors were saying, it was just a minor complication. God, she was aware that not all the births were the same; but did she wish for Chloe's to be like hers. Just vomit and dizziness.

"The mom will be okay," One of the nurses spoke softly. "She just needs to rest and regain strength," and with a soft squeeze on her arm, she made her way out the room.

Just then she felt the happiness take over her. A soft teary laugh escaping her lips. Both of her girls were safe and sound. All she could ask was for Bella to be here with them. Her family of four -as she pictured quietly in her mind, was a reality. If only Chloe could love her back.

"Welcome, my little sunshine," she whispered to the tiny human in her arms. "I promise you that you'll never be alone," her index finger caressing the softness of Elli's face. She opted she'd call her that till Chloe comes up with her name.

"Stace?" a hushed voice called her. Looking at the bed, Chloe was staring at them with tears in her eyes.

"You did it," she placed the baby in her mother's arms. Her heart jumping at the moment. "You did this beautiful being." she couldn't help but bring their forehead together. Something that she got used to doing time ago.

"She's beautiful," were Chloe's words before a comfortable silence settled between them as Chloe started to breastfeed her daughter. Stacie melting at such an intimate moment between mother-child.

"I want to name her Hope," the redhead looked at her. A shy smile on her lips.

"Hope Beale. It really suits, Chlo" she kissed her forehead before returning her attention to her Hope.

She didn't know exactly when things at home became a mess. Hope wouldn't stop crying and Chloe wouldn't stop feeling sad whenever she had to take care of her child. Her energy started to drown off her body as she tried to calm both parties -literally- all the time. She started to worry that it could be PPD. She knew it was -somehow common after the childbirth itself and, even if she knew little about it, some of the symptoms matched.

"Shhh, it's okay little one," she tried to calm a crying Hope who seemed to decide to test her limits. "Please, don't cry baby girl," she couldn't hold back the tears anymore. "Your mommy loves you to pieces. She's just going through a hard moment," she kissed the baby's nose. "I promise you that."

"A dream is a wish your heart makes when you're fast asleep" Stacie sang the words fighting the lump on her throat. "In dreams, you lose your heartaches. Whatever you wish for, you keep…" she continued rocking her softly. Her sweet voice and the movements finally working. Hope started to calm gradually as she continued. "Have faith in your dreams and someday, your rainbow will come smiling through" her left hand starting to brush a thin line in between the baby's eyebrows. "No matter how your heart is grieving. If you keep on believing, the dream that you wish will come true"

And as if magic was something real, by the end of the lullaby Hope fell in a pleasant dream. Something Stacie was really thankful about. One last look at the crib, she made her way to Chloe. The redhead was in the living room staring at her with tears. Her beautiful smile absent for days, now; making her heartache.

"Come here," She opened her arms as she sat beside her friend.

"You're a literal angel, Stace," Chloe curled up in her arms. Another action that became common among them. When Hope wasn't asking for attention, she'd would happily cuddle Chloe up. Sometimes -always- in bed.

"Can I say something without you snapping?" she asked after some minutes in silence. Her voice trembling with anticipation.

"You know it's not my-"

"I know, baby. I'm aware of that," she started to play with red locks. "That's why I think you may have postpartum depression." the words came as whispers. Chloe pushing herself apart as if she'd been burned.

"Wha-... Do you think so?" and she was surprised that Chloe took her words into consideration. Even if she knew the redhead was very uncomfortable.

"I'm not a psychologist. But the sadness, the anxiety and you not sleeping at all considering I'm looking after Hope... yeah. All those symptoms match," she felt her chest close at the way Chloe could react to this information.

"I... I don't want medication," she almost pleaded. Her voice breaking at the end.

"Maybe you don't need them," Stacie took her trembling hands between her own. "Maybe all you need is going to see someone and working on your bonding with Hope. She needs you, sweetie," her voice came softly. Something that surprised her, but thanked nonetheless.

"I will," Chloe finally let herself cry as the realization stroke her. "I love her, I swear I do!" the sobs making her body shake. "I just want to be a good mom."

"And you will be," Stacie wrapped her arms around her, bringing her closer. "I'm not going anywhere and I promise you that everything will be okay."

Stacie released her own tears right then. She cried all the feeling she had bottled up in order to protect her girls. She needed to gain strength for the recovering. Hopefully, it'll be easier than the last weeks.

Just as she promised them. Chloe and Hope were finally bonding. Chloe had started to enjoy her daughter's spark. Now that the crying decreased noticeably, they got to let her sleep between them when she had colics.

"Look Stace! she has a mole on her neck just like you!" Chloe cried as she got to change her.

"No, she doesn't" the brunette started to look for the mark on the baby's body. And just there, right above her collarbone, a pale brown spot contrasted lightly against the pink skin.

"See?" Chloe caressed the spot making Hope's giggles to sound in the room. Both their hearts expanding every time they got to hear her laugh. "You're like her moma"

Stacie's heart stopped at the words. Her body freezing in time. Sweet lord, would she make a pact with the devil to make it happen.

"Stace?" Chloe called. "You know you are like her mom, right?" and the confusion she felt should be reflected on her face because Chloe just kept explaining. "You took care of her when I couldn't and you love her like your own. You even asked for weeks off after she had born," she felt Chloe's hand squeeze her arm.

"Perks of being a great scientist who is in charge," she joked as if trying to hide the lovey-dovey words menacing to scape her mouth.

She grabbed Hope and started to walk to the living room but a hand grabbed her own, stopping her in tracks and making her face Chloe. Before she could protest, soft lips captured hers. A timid movement that started to became eager. Chloe smiled into the kiss, making her laugh.

"Did you really-"

"I did," Chloe affirmed with her head. "I figured you'd never tell me so I couldn't hold back anymore." she shrugged, taking Hope in her arms.

Her mouth started to open and close at the lack of words. Her brain had probably melted. All she wanted was to properly try those lips. And so she did. Closing the distance -trying to remember that an infant was between them, both women melted in a kiss full of feelings and promises of being there for each other. Forever. After all the stress they went through, she was optimist enough to give herself to the redhead.

"Seems like Bella's wish had become a reality," Chloe laughed softly, kissing her daughter's cheek.

"Seem like we are a family of four," she hugged both her girls, already imagining her daughter's happiness when they get to break the news to the kid the next day. And honestly, she couldn't ask for more.

[footmantravelagency]

5 Reasons Why You Need A Travel Agent - More Than Ever

Want to rent a villa in Tuscany and do it on your own? It’s simple. Just type “Villa Rentals Tuscany” into Google, then wade through the four and a half million responses - most of which look the same, whether they are good or bad, legit or bogus. Spend just 10 seconds each vetting sites, and you’ll be done in a year and a half - and still won’t have rented anything.

Good luck with that - or even with much simpler planning, like searches for “straightforward” airfares. The major search sites routinely leave out flights (lots of them) and even entire airlines. A lot of the flights they do show are ones you don’t want, starting with “basic economy” fares that hit you with tons of restrictions and fees, so the price you see isn’t the one you end up paying, along with connections way too short or way too long, ones that no responsible travel agent would let you book.

Travel agents are even more important to luxury travelers, who ironically often think they know a lot about travel and rely on their own misguided sense of expertise. But while a good agent is so vital that it is simply foolish to plan a high-end trip on your own without one, they can also help travelers of all budgets.

The reality is that while it was widely predicted that the internet was going to kill off travel agents when digital tools were placed at every traveler’s disposal, that just hasn’t happened, for several good reasons.

Shannon Compton Game writes on money saving travel tips and budget travel for Outside Magazine, not the publication I’d expect to praise travel agents over DIY. But last year she wrote a column about his subject and opened with, “I’m a big fan of travel agents, even though I could technically book all my trips through websites and apps.” She then listed the specific pros of using an agent: “They can find crazy deals”; “They will be your advocate”; “They’ll take care of the little things”; “They’re true experts” and “They don’t usually cost extra.”

True, true, true, true and true. But that’s just the tip of the iceberg.

I have been writing on travel and related tips for over a quarter of a century. I’m an expert on the subject, and I get interviewed and publicly speak about it. Do I sometimes use a travel agent? Absolutely. When friends ask for travel advice, and they do, all the time, one of the first suggestions I always make is to get a good travel agent. My tech savviest friends use travel advisors, and so does every major corporation - because it is the smart thing to do.

“Yes, the travel landscape is changing,” said Chad Clark, principal of Chad Clark Travel Ventures in Phoenix, an expert I have known for years. “Information overload, thousands of new hotels on the scene, all sorts of new cruise ships, passport and visa issues, weather, transit strikes, political unrest, natural disasters, travel insurance, travel providers going out of business, it’s never ending. How does one navigate all of this? To avoid the travel landmines that lay in front of you, you need to get a great travel advisor! You’ll be glad you did. After all, do you cut your own hair?” Good question, but his metaphor is a little off because you pay someone to cut your hair, while a good travel advisor can often save you money.

I wrote a feature about this topic here at Forbes eight years ago, and I still get thank you comments from people who took my advice. A lot has changed in those eight years, and a lot has not, so if anything, there are more reasons than ever to use a travel agent (for the record, good travel agents prefer to be called travel advisors, or sometimes travel consultants, and those are both totally accurate, but since most people still think of the industry in terms of travel agents, I’m mixing and matching).

Clark explained it to me this way, “Travel agents are a thing of the past - they primarily booked tickets and beds. Travel advisors have taken on a much more complex role - part psychologist, life coach, executive producer, concierge, fixer, dream maker, and ‘Blink Blink’ genie, with the multitude of services that they provide.”

Whatever you call them, I could go on and on about all the reason to use one, but here are the 5 biggies.

Emergencies: This is the one most applicable to the average occasional travel. Stuff happens, and whether you believe in climate change or not (spoiler alert, it’s real), big weather events have become more commonplace, widespread and unpredictable, and sooner or later Mother Nature is going to bite you when flying. But there are plenty of non-weather events disrupting flights, cruises, trains and destinations, from civil unrest to volcanic eruptions to disease outbreaks to massive wildfires to labor strikes. And just about every year you read about an airline that went bust and shut down suddenly, stranding all its passengers. Just a week ago I traveled with owner of a large New York based travel agency who has been in the business for 40 years, and he told me they recently stopped selling their customers tickets on Norwegian because the airline has had too many cancellations and became, in their view, unreliable. But cheap flights still show up in internet searches, and you probably would not know anything about it without expert advice.

Anything that causes cancelled flights (or cruises, etc.) means hassles, but the people who get through this process the most smoothly and the ones who get rebooked first and get the few available seats out of Dodge are usually the ones who used a travel agent. It’s that simple. First off, you actually have someone to call, versus long lines at banks of airport phones masquerading as “help desks.” But good agencies are constantly monitoring their clients’ flights and they usually know about your problem before you do - and often have a resolution before you even call them. They also have direct access to airline GDS (global distribution system) and don’t have to wait on long phones holds to get ticketing changes made. It’s worth noting that according to the U.S. Department of Transportation, nearly two percent of all domestic flights were canceled in 2019, a significant increase from the previous year and the highest rate since 2014. Midway through the year, MSNBC reported that passengers were being bumped from flights - involuntarily - at a rate three times higher than a year earlier.

I’ve known Anne Scully for years, and as the President of high-powered Virginia-based agency McCabe World Travel, she is perennially ranked one of the world’s best travel agents, sits on advisory boards of major luxury hotel brands and cruise lines, and is an industry legend. She told me that, “Anyone who travels should have the clout of a top travel advisor in their pocket. To start, if the client’s flight is cancelled while they are waiting for take-off they could have us rebook and protect their journey before they depart the plane. No waiting behind 300 other passengers! We can have clients met at the plane door at a large number of airports worldwide and whisked through customs, either on to their tight connecting flight or simply faster to baggage claim - where they are given help with their luggage. Most clients don’t even know that service exists, but they only need to use it once to always request it on their itineraries.”

Expertise: No one knows everything about travel, no matter how deeply they are involved in the industry. I am an expert on ski travel, and I know the ins and outs of every major luxury ski hotel in this country. So, I wouldn’t call a travel agent to help me choose a ski hotel. But I know nothing about the hotel scene in Manilla or Sri Lanka. Some travelers cheat their way around this by sticking to brands like Four Seasons or Ritz-Carlton wherever the go, but in many tourism hotbeds like Fez, Morocco, all the best hotels are ones you have likely never heard of. This is where a travel advisor’s knowledge cannot be beat. And while even the best travel agent can’t know everything either, the good agencies parcel things up, so they have a safari expert, a cruise expert, a honeymoon expert, and so on, and they all work together.

Walter Brownell first escorted 10 guests to Europe in 1887, and 133 years later, Brownell Travel has 150 advisors. Sorry, but there’s no amount of research you can do or number of travel magazines you can read that can match that kind of institutional experience and collective expertise. That’s the knowledge base you want. Let’s go back to the 4.5 million villa hits - any good travel advisor will be able to tell you off the top of their head who you should be renting your villa in Tuscany from - and why. That just saved you eighteen months, and probably got you a better house.

Chad Clark believes travelers should, “Experience the extraordinary, not once in a lifetime, but every time!” and to showcase the knowledge base advisors bring to the table, he created a program he calls “Chad Clark Certified,” personally giving his stamp of approval to special hotels, restaurants, tours and experiences around the world. To date he’s certified nearly 700 different things his clients (or you) can reliably consider doing.

It is important to remember that these advantages are not just for luxury travelers. Good travel advisors do not just know what the best hotel is, they know what the best hotel is for you and your budget and can help you find the right fit. As we will see shortly, they can also save you a lot of money, no matter what style you travel in.

VIP Connections: Whether you are trying to book space at a coveted 8-villa safari lodge in Africa or get a room in a top Paris hotel during Fashion Week, most hoteliers keep emergency inventory and guess who gets it? The travel advisors they have known for years who book a lot of guests and send them a lot of business. It works this way with lots of things in the travel industry, from hard to get dinner reservations to the resort’s best ski instructor to a city’s top art expert as a private museum guide. Anytime there is scarcity, there is no substitute for personal connections, and the best agents have built these over years or decades. Plus we are living in the age of “experiential travel,” and good advisors create one of kind experiences most people would never have imagined in the first place.

“I had a client touring Russia who not only played piano well, but also took lessons from one of the best teachers in New York,” said Anne McCabe. “As a surprise, I arranged for him to visit the apartment of the great Russian composer Nicolai Rimsky Korsakov, and the curator invited him to play the composer’s piano, while his teacher listened over the phone his wife was holding. You cannot create those WOW moments if you do not get to know who your clients are, and what would make their holiday most special.” You also need to know the curator. Try booking that on TripAdvisor.

“This is a key point,” stressed Clark. “Travel advisors provide our clients with access: access to people, places, and experiences that could never be replicated, much less imagined. A great travel advisor has invested time and relationships in creating their ‘black book’ of contacts and relationships, so that when their clients travel, they are treated as a VIPs, not just a credit card number.” In my experience, everyone likes being treated like a VIP.

Seemingly simple things often annoy even the most seasoned travelers, but these irritants can be smoothed out by good advisors. One biggie is having your room ready to check in when arriving in Europe early in the morning after an exhausting overnight flight. I’ve seen lots of travelers, including myself, told to go walk around for hours and come back at two or three in the afternoon, even at the finest hotels. Do you think they tell that to Anne Scully and her peers?

Another one of the most frustrating recurring problems I hear in the industry - even at the top luxury hotels - is a notorious refusal to guarantee connecting rooms in advance for families booking multiple rooms (and paying a lot for them). But when your travel agent books hundreds of room nights with a hotel each year, the GM (or sales manager) will move heaven and earth to give that agent’s client - you - guaranteed connecting rooms. For the same price. Often with a room upgrade. And late check out. And a free food and beverage credit.

But I’m getting ahead of myself.

Extras: When you get more than you expected for the same price, that’s a great deal, and with travel advisors this happens all the time. The cruise industry is a perfect example of very large inventories that fluctuate in supply and demand each week, with a large audience of repeat customers who cruise again and again for years. The cruise lines do not want to lose the loyalty of those customers - or the agents who steer hundreds of them each year to particular brands. Yet it basically costs the line no more to have you stay in a deluxe suite than a basic room if that suite is available, and with the size of today’s ships, it often is. But who gets these upgrades? Advisors. Professionals who specialize in cruises have enormous volume clout and are legendary for routinely getting clients one or two class stateroom upgrades, free shore excursions, onboard credits and all sorts of things - for the same exact price you pay going direct. I would never book a cruise without using a travel advisor - it’s just foolish.

But it’s not just cruises.  

“In an age of automation, it may come as a surprise that many of our new clients skew on the more tech-savvy side, and come to SmartFlyer for the first time seeking guidance on their honeymoon,” Michael Holtz, founder of extremely successful global travel agency SmartFlyer told me. “The millennial generation specifically may have seen their parents use a travel advisor, but don’t feel like they need one - until they are deep in the spiral of research. By shifting gears to planning with an expert, they feel liberated from the immense pressure of choosing the ‘best’ resort - because we’re cutting through the noise of all the conflicting opinions they’re seeing online. Our team has actually been to the properties first-hand - not to mention has personal relationships with the General Managers. For example, we just had a couple fly to Canouan, a remote island in the Caribbean that they had no idea even existed before we recommended it. When they arrived at the Mandarin Oriental, the GM double upgraded them thanks to SmartFlyer’s close relationship with the property. At the end of the day, it’s all about personal relationships translating into exceptional experiences for our clients.”

One of the biggest shortcuts to freebies and extras is Virtuoso, a network of top tier travel agencies, most in the luxury realm. While agencies belonging to Virtuoso are independent and free to recommend and book anything they want - and often do because they have strong opinions - the network has specific relationships with over 1,800 travel partners (cruise, tours, airlines and 1,400 individual hotels in 100+ countries) with which it negotiates exclusive (and contractually obligated) benefits. Why are travel suppliers so eager to work with agencies and advisors that belong to Virtuoso (advisors can join by invitation-only based on their track records)?  Because last year Virtuoso members booked $26.4 billion in travel for their clients.

So in addition to the extras for personal connections you can get via people like Michael Holtz knowing the GM, anyone who books through a Virtuoso agency gets automatic perks like complimentary daily breakfast, room upgrades, early check-in, late check-out, complimentary airport transfers, spa credits and so on (specifics vary by hotel). According to Virtuoso, just the hotel benefits are valued at an average of over $500 per stay. Complimentary cruise benefits can be even bigger.

But having covered the luxury travel space for years, it seems that virtually every top advisor and agency I come across, the ones my friends, family and colleagues recommend, belongs to Virtuoso, as do all of the agencies mentioned in this piece besides the one in Travel Leaders. I just visited an amazing new luxury hotel in Italy, and they were quick to boast about having been admitted as preferred Virtuoso property - to them it was a mark of quality like earning a Michelin-star.

“The thing I love about Virtuoso is not just the quality of the advisors, but the strength of the entire network and the supplier partners they use around the world,” said travel writer, award-winning broadcaster and author Michael Patrick Shiels. “I decided to do this segment on running with the bulls in Pamplona and I had never been to Spain, so a Virtuoso advisor connected me with Made For Spain and Portugal, a partner ground supplier that does all the behind the scenes magic. They know everyone and totally set up an amazing itinerary and I ran with the bulls. In Italy, Virtuoso has an amazing local company called IC (Italian Connection) Bellagio that is totally wired into all the kinds of local things travelers say they want these days, special experiences, the best restaurants, art tours of private villas. When you ask your Virtuosos agent to plan a trip to Tuscany, it’s not just them, they have all this expert support behind them, down to the micro level. I’ve been all around the world, and before the first time I worked with Virtuoso I didn’t think I needed a travel agent’s help - now I can’t imagine not using one for anything complicated or specialized.”

Air: If you are trying to buy the cheapest round-trip economy ticket from New York to Dallas, even the best advisors probably can’t get it for less than you can buy it online, though you still have to deal with all the pitfalls of the online travel sites and you will lose the safety net advisors provide when things go wrong. But in a couple of other cases, buying your air through an agent can actually save you money, or miles, or both.

One case is when you are buying premium class tickets, Business, First or some of the even higher new classes. I have an extremely tech savvy friend in San Francisco who wanted to fly First class to Hawaii for his honeymoon, and even though he could afford it, he was shocked how much the airlines wanted. I suggested he call McCabe World Travel, and he was mystified how they could purchase the exact same tickets for about two thousand dollars less -each - than the best price he could find online, by calling the airline, or through the American Express Platinum Card travel desk. I don’t care how rich you are, if you can get the same tickets and pocket four thousand dollars that’s a good deal - plus you get all the peace of mind that comes with the advisor’s safety net. Not surprisingly, years later he still uses McCabe for all his travel. Consider this: the agency has three advisors in its air travel department who do nothing else, among its roughly 50 affiliated advisors.

When it comes to using miles, or miles and money, or just paying to fly in pricier premium classes, you might have trouble believing the miracles these specialists can work. As Largay’s Klimak told me, “I was working with a couple last year traveling to Australia and New Zealand for their dream cruise. They wanted to use frequent flyer miles, and I knew that they also had Dubai on their Wanderlist. I was able to change their flights from Business class on Qantas to First Class on Emirates - for half the mileage. We were also able to add a stopover with a wonderful desert and shopping experience in Dubai, checking two destinations off their list for a fraction of the cost.”

I use SmartFlyer for tricky tickets. Despite its name, it is a well-known, full-service luxury travel agency that does everything from safaris to cruises, but where they are better than just about everyone else is creative ticketing. I hear endless complaints from frequent fliers about the difficulty using miles, but I have found that is not the case - if you use a mileage and ticketing expert. I did a story on skiing in Japan, and SmartFlyer was able to get me to Tokyo in Business Class and back in First for $1,500 and 100,000 United miles. This was less than a third of the miles United directly quoted me for the same trip when I called the MileagePlus Elite desk, and I ended up getting more than three times the dollars per mile that most experts value frequent flier miles at.

On another trip recent trip to Bali, SmartFlyer found me flights on Cathay Pacific - one of the world’s best airlines - in Premium Economy to Hong Kong and then the five hour leg to Bali in Business class, for less than Cathy was selling the trip on its site just in Premium Economy the whole way. It just doesn’t seem possible, but it is, real tickets, same airline, better seats, less money. I don’t know how they do it, and frankly I don’t care, but if you know who to call this happens all the time (if you are not a client of SmartFlyer booking your vacation or business trip, they will charge you a fee to do the legwork and find you great deals on premium and mileage tickets, but in almost every case I’ve seen, it still saves you money).

“In terms of value, what we can do is unparalleled to anything clients will find elsewhere,” SmartFlyer’s Holtz told me. “Our negotiated air contracts, along with our in-depth knowledge of the carriers and actual aircraft, means we can advise travelers how to reach their destination at the best possible price and in the most comfortable configuration. Sometimes, this means hundreds of dollars in savings per ticket.” Or more.

Better Trips! At the end of the day this is the bottom line, the big win you get with a good travel advisor. They know more than you do, they are better connected, they have access to benefits you can’t get yourself, and they can match and often beat any prices you find. They plan a better trip and then provide a safety net. Having a top travel agent can make you an instant VIP, certainly will save you time and hassle, and quite possibly money.

Amanda Foshee is an advisor at Brownell Travel, and she summed it up nicely: “What everyone needs these days is more time and less stress, and that’s what we’re here for. Travel advisors take the overwhelming amount of information out there and distill it into the key points that apply to you - the best hotel/destination/tour for your interests, your budget, and your time frame. A client shared that going through all the information online to plan a trip would be a second full-time job for her, and I told her that’s why it’s my full-time job instead!”

[allenmendezsr]

Bake-a-dog-a-bone

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[thisislizheather]

Navigating November 2020

Wonderful, another month has come and gone. It’s hard to tell when I’m in a bad mood these days. I feel like all of my moods are sprinkled with bits of sadness since it’s been such a rough year on everyone. It seems hard to be hopeful and optimistic for the coming months because of everything that has gone on already, but I think I’ll continue on with my internal mantra of “fake it ‘til you make it” - that’s healthy, right? In any case, here’s what happened last month:

I usually don’t mention the things that I don’t do, but this one is notable: I didn’t have the Thanksgiving croissant from Milk Bar this year (because I’m in Canada at the moment). So this is really just a reminder to myself to go hog-wild on them next November.

I can’t remember if I’ve mentioned them before, but the ready-made roast beef sandwiches at San Remo’s in Etobicoke? A PERFECT SANDWICH.

I rewatched the original (better) Jumanji and goddamit what a great movie. How did I forget what a perfect movie that was? Miss Robin Williams so much. Which reminds me: I gotta rewatch Jack soon (Coppola’s greatest movie, in my humble opinion). Haven’t seen that one in ages.

Some thoughts on how to have a less expensive Christmas.

Love the new “Oat Milk Latte” nail polish colour at Urban Outfitters. Something about a boring neutral has been really turning me on lately.

The best new hand lotion I’ve used in a long time: this Kiehl’s Hand Salve. I put it on once in the morning and once before bed and it’s crazy how soft it makes them, even if you wash your hands numerous times a day (which, god, I hope you’re doing).

I know that I tend to live in the past at times, but are you ever needing to print some photos fast and don’t know where to get it done? Years ago, they had machines at Shoppers and then they disappeared. And I just discovered that Staples has those print-right-now machines! It takes seconds to print from your phone and it’s crazy cheap. I think you can only get 4 x 6 in size, but still. That’s great!

I’ll always love Cobs Bread (thanks to Marla years ago for introducing me) but I just tried their garlic focaccia and my god. Heavenly. It also makes a great base for any kind of at-home grilled cheese or even an at-home garlic bread using garlic butter.

So I tried the Popeye’s chicken sandwich that people were stabbing each other for and… I fully understand the murdering mentality. It’s an incredible chicken sandwich. I was expecting not to understand the hype, but here I stand before you, four chicken sandwiches deep.

I’ve been consistently using the Luna Night Oil from Sunday Riley (a small version that came with a gift set) and I think it’s really working well. My skin looks amazing in the morning after each use. So I might bite the bullet and buy the full size when I run out.

Just so sad to see Alex Trebek pass away. Favourite clip, followed by second favourite clip.

I simply cannot stop ordering the vegetable fried rice from Fortune Dragon in Mississauga. Can’t and WON’T.

I had such a terrible experience using Skip The Dishes the other night (there was a problem with an order and the restaurant refused to fix the problem and I was on the phone with STD (hahah, can we all call them this from now on PLEASE) for over an hour, just disgusting). So now they’re banned in our house.

And speaking of annoying food experiences, Scaddabush got rid of the best sandwich on their menu. What. the. hell. It was a prosciutto cotto grilled cheese with Italian cured ham, caramelized onions, mozzarella, and fig jam on a focaccia bun and IT IS NO MORE. I did attempt to make it at home one night and it was actually really good, but still. Who wants to spend their evenings caramelizing onions for hours in the kitchen? Well, I do, for one. But regardless! Bad move, Scaddabush.

I came across these actually helpful, fast TikTok beauty tips.

Excited to visit this new food hall in Long Island City one day.

Love these two new Tierra Whack songs.

I love hearing these kinds of butterfly effect stories, always.

This whole listicle made me laugh.

How on earth can someone build a roller coaster in their backyard? People continue to impress me. This is amazing.

It’s pure and complete trash that chihuahuas never win dog shows. 

Look at this beauty from The National Dog Show.

Considering this beautiful palette for purchase even though I have plans to go nowhere, every night, for the rest of time.

I made these fondant potatoes and they were good! Love a new way to cook a potato.

I watched Coneheads for the first time and it was a surprisingly fun movie. It also happens to be the ultimate pro-immigration movie. Loved it.

I watched the Fresh Prince reunion and it was good! It was nice to see Nicky.

If you’re looking for a dog groomer in Mississauga, I can’t say enough good things about You Lucky Dog Grooming. They cut Baby Dog’s nails perfectly for $10 and it took less than five minutes. They were so gentle and caring, definitely only gonna go here from now on.

There were a few massive holes in the ceiling in my parents basement (an estimate said it would be $1000 to fix) so I went to Home Depot, got the supplies and did it myself. This is something I would never even want to do, let alone actually do, so the fact that it’s fixed now is insane. Here's what it looked like.

Above Photo: This whole job cost $17 from Home Depot. Nothing is impossible.

I made my niece Layla watch Sleeping With The Enemy and The Curious Case of Benjamin Button for the first time and I think she liked both, which obviously I love. Love making people I love watch things I love.

Absolutely in love with this song. And this one, too.

So I got fake nails. Here they are.

Yes, I love them. Yes, they look perfect every single day and that’s amazing. But no one tells you the cons, so let me tell you what they are.

Pressing buttons is an annoyance. The buttons of debit machines especially (I’ve incorrectly put in my pin about three times so far), but also remote controls and car radio dials.

Peeling onions or garlic. Or cutting anything on a cutting board in the kitchen, basically.

You know after a shower when you towel off the wet parts of the inside of your ears? Can’t be done.

All zippers and buttons add at least five minutes to your life.

Look, I’m not an animal but sometimes your nose needs a little cleaning when a tissue ain’t gonna cut it. That being said, it is IMPOSSIBLE to pick your nose with these.

Typing at your regular speed.

Peeling clementines is simply out of the question (which is annoying because they’re so in season right now).

Putting on and taking off necklaces.

And most of all, yes you can still scratch parts of your body, but it’s an unfulfilling scratch. These nails aren’t as sharp as my real ones, so the scratch is lackluster.

That being said, I do love them. I’m not sure if I’ll get them again, but they’re beautiful and I can definitely see the appeal.

I watched a few episodes of Somebody Feed Phil with my brother Robbie and it’s a pretty cute show. I only watched the New York, New Orleans, Venice & San Francisco episodes, but I’m sure I’ll watch the rest soon. I think I liked it because the host really lets the guests be the charming, endearing ones, and most TV hosts aren’t very good at that.

So since we missed both Thanksgivings this year, we picked a random day to do our turkey dinner and this year I did the rub for the bird (Mom handled all the gross stuff) and it came out amazing! Also made my favourite salad dressing (love a shallot in a dressing), this perfect cranberry sauce and best garlic bread. And instead of a whole pie, we just got mini pumpkin tarts from Whole Foods. The next day, I finally made the moist maker sandwich (from Friends) and it turned out really well.

Best tweets of the month can be found over here.

Some things that I’m looking forward to this month: watching the new season of Big Mouth, doing the Polar Drive experience, there have been only two snowstorms so far and I can’t wait for more to come, and I’ve already started baking the chocolate chip Nutella cookies that I love to make this time of year but I want to try something new as well so I’m thinking about giving these ones a try. Christmas will of course be different this year, it’s looking like it’ll be me, my parents (since I’ve been staying here since October), Nathan & Baby Dog on Christmas morning, which actually seems like it might be kind of intimate and nice. It’ll feel wrong in certain ways because I love having my entire family here, but I’m going to try and make the most of it.

If you’ve got any interest in reading last month’s roundup, you can see what went down in October over here.

[nozofro]

Unfortunate.

So why behavioural science, you ask? Good question, I say, whilst nodding sagely at you. Well, it’s bloody fascinating to me, and being interested in what you do tends to be a pretty important ingredient in life salad. I’m not going to explain here what behavioural science/behavioural economics is. My pro-tip will always be to click on any hyperlinks I’ve included. But at a really high level – it’s studying decision making. Why is it that we often make (often the same) dumb-ass moves? Well, there’s a whole field of super smart people running experiments and analyses to help us out here. As I say … bloody fascinating.

So, this blog is about The Thing. My Thing happens to be behavioural science and there’ll be a journey to get where I want to be. Comfort levels will cop an elbow to the face. Challenges will pop up like whack-a-moles. Procrastination and self-doubt will be the annoying itchy bites that piss you off, but you Can’t. Stop. Scratching. Them. Anyway, there’s a quote I read recently, and it’s the shizness:

“I judge you unfortunate because you have never lived through misfortune. You have passed through life without an opponent – no one can ever know what you are capable of. Not even you.” – Seneca

Now, let me preface what I’m about to say next with this. I’m an incredibly lucky single woman in her 30’s with a great job I enjoy (in operations), excellent health, pretty good education despite being a high school drop-out and a gaggle of loving family and friends who are ace human beings. Life is awesome and I stop often and smell those stinkin’ beautiful roses. Coz they stink good.

However, in 2017, there were some downs too. A heart-wrenching break up and sudden deaths of close family among other things. Firstly, let me say something important. If your crapper is busted, you call a professional plumber. Secondly, if you are going through a tough time that needs professional help – call a professional. Not a sympathetic family member or friend. They’re great, but seriously. Call a professional. You’d do it for your crapper. Do it for yourself. I did and it’s one of the best decisions I’ve ever made.

Now, there’s no Phoenix rising from the ashes to see here. This is real life. Not a 15 minute TED talk. Going back to what that damn fine Seneca said, in knowing what you are capable of. Now that’s the business right there. I realised that I recently came into the possession of something pretty powerful. I know what I want to be when I grow up! That, combined with resources to chase this dream means uncertainty, adventure, discomfort, risk, saving hard (because right now, I actually don’t have the resources yet – but I will!) and picking up a machete to hack a new path through the jungle of my life.

Which brings me to Guatemala. Okay, yes, but next time hey? This blog has probably already violated the rules of brevity. Hasta la pasta.    

[thegracegatsby]

this post is all over the place but here’s a super long update if you care lmao 

So it’s officially been one month since i’ve been on this marketing internship in Prague which is basically working a full time marketing job without the pay (duh, Grace) lol I really thought I was going to be filing papers and going on coffee runs, but nope this is the real deal. I didn’t even get a day to fix my jetlag nor was I eased into the job. The day after I arrived I had 15 minutes to learn about all the projects everyone was working on, got acquainted with the office and the other interns, then started on all my tasks. To give you an idea of what I’ve been up to, my first week here I had to think of several marketing ideas for a local company and had to present them to the owner. The Stress and nerves had me on bed rest that weekend ngl lol. The owner loved the presentation, but I couldn’t help but be so hard on myself. I felt so underprepared I didn’t expect to be thrown into the field at full speed. I literally felt like the Mr. Krabs meme. I was shookington. I thought college and a regular part time job was hectic, but wow I was not prepared for job that required 110% of my time and mind. What I mean by that is I was/am technically working on four different projects and each of them need to be unique aka I can’t repeat ideas. I learned to trust myself and just trust that if I did my best…. it would just had to be enough. I can only learn from my mistakes and find a way to improve myself every day. Those “do one thing to be better than yesterday” quotes were always cute, but they have been extremely relevant this summer. That’s been such an important lesson and habit. Some other things I was up to is sometimes the company gets invited to special private events so so far I’ve attended two events. The first one being some networking event with a panel so different CEO’s discussed the future of tech & marketing and answered questions, then another event where the communications director of Manolo (shoe goals) spoke on the brand. Even got to meet her she was so sweet! Last week I got sent on my first official business trip to Poland to meet with different Korean companies at an expo! I had to basically see and negotiate potential products to market in the US and Latin America. Crazy. I loved every second of it. I’ve been meaning to write for a few weeks now so my thoughts are probably a little all over the place, but now is when I feel like I finally have the time and energy to sit down and catch up on a blog even if no one reads this lmaoo. It’s wild how a month and a half ago I left my job at the bank with a heavy heart and had my summer classes get cancelled/wasn’t able to register for any new one’s since they were all full. I was so close to doing nothing all summer except go job hunting again so this trip was such a blessing. It’s super challenging I’m not gonna lie. I feel like I’ve grown so much from being here. I’ve had to get out of my comfort zone in every single sense of the word. I’ve had to depend on myself mentally and emotionally in different ways than I’ve had to back home. I know this sounds super dramatic lol, but honestly this is the first time I’ve been away from my home, family, friends, city, for more than two weeks. Taking such a huge step without my family around has been difficult. It’s how I imagine it would have been like if I moved away for college. I’m going through “real life with training wheels” because I’m staying with family here so I’m not 100% on my own, but that’s the farthest thing from perfect. Like.. my extended family is going through some hell shit and I feel like I’m in the middle of it so I can’t escape it. I guess that’s where my desperate homesickness comes from. I was SO ready to go home I even asked if I could book a flight after TWO weeks of being here. That’s how desperate I was to go back home. I never talk about my personal life, but I will say that my actual home life, thankfully, is healthy. No relationship/family is perfect don’t get it twisted, but my parents learned from the mistakes of their families/friends and tried very hard to raise my sibling and I in a peaceful home. Don’t take this as the “I’m the best because my parents don’t hate each other can’t relate sweetie (: just be happy and drink tea” way because that’s not what I’m saying at all lol. Sadly, toxic families are everywhere, but reading/hearing about a household that is going through a nasty divorce with unhealthy drama happening every single day is completely different than actually experiencing/witnessing it with my own two naked eye balls. Especially from my own relative. I know this makes me sound immature or naive or whatever, but I mean… I’ve never lived anywhere else so I never knew anything other than my own family dynamic ya know? My empathy for children and teenagers who have to go through what I’ve been seeing on a daily basis has grown so much. Again, this isn’t a show off way of me saying “my life is semi-perfect” (no one’s is) I’m literally saying the change has helped me understand and appreciate the importance of a healthy home so much which… isn’t a bad thing. I’d rather learn this now seeing it from afar than with regret later on in my life. I’m genuinely so heartbroken and empathetic for every single person going through this much toxicity especially my own cousin who will have to grow up with the issues her parents are making alone. The biggest takeaway is I know what the fuck NOT to tolerate in relationships. If I thought my tolerance was low, now it’s even lower I’m not putting up with any bullshit ever wow. Now none of this would matter if I only got to work then go home and mind my business, but nah it’s not like that. An argument happened? Guess who gets some insults and bad attitude. Me. Since why did my extended family think it’s okay to disrespect and insult me for everything??? Don’t even get me started on the side comments about my weight :)) All I do is try to stay hydrated and mind my business! lmaofdnsfds. I guess that’s where the mental and emotional challenge comes from. I’ve never been a super emotional person literally the last time I cried from emotion was the day of the musical in high school because I messed up on stage and was super embarrassed. That was literally 4 years ago in April. I’ve had like two mental breakdowns already not including the countless times I’ve had to calm myself down, do some breathing exercises, and mentally try to disconnect from the fuckery. The hardest times being when I’m in public. I NEVER talk back tho which is weird because I hardly ever bite my tongue I’m quick to defend myself, but deep down I know the aggression stems from all these problems.. plus I try to tell myself it’s not that deep and I’m leaving in less than a month. I know I won’t have to deal with this ever ever again. Also honestly staying quiet gets everyone on my side because people see the way I’m spoken to and are like “wtf ignore it you’re doing great”. Lol I wish I could go into more detail because there is SO much tea I can spill, but for privacy (and maybe legal idk?) reasons I’m going to stay quiet. Another intern who started seeing the verbal abuse asked me about everything so I confided in her about all the drama and she’s like “wooow everything makes sense things were worse when before you got here” kjndvdf we were super tight it was so great :’) but she left and everything changed when the fire nation attacked. Honestly, everyone I work/have worked with have been so great. I only got close with like two or three tho but still everyone is so nice lol. So yeah even though the work experience here is amazing and something I will value for the rest of my life, the home life aspect is fucked up. I’m even trying to convince my parents to sell this plot to Lifetime lmao it’s THAT dramatic. *sigh* Some other news is I was supposed to be in Spain right now. I literally Uber’ed myself and my grandmother all the way to the airport yesterday morning, show up to the check-in counter with a smile and bags in hand just so they could tell me “Sorry, you don’t show up on our system” to my face. I’ve never had an issue with my flight so the room was spinning a lil and was low key panicking because 1. English isn’t anyone’s first language here 2. I was abroad and had no idea what to do because I didn’t even make the reservation so I had to call two different airlines and try to resolve the MESS, but nothing was resolved they fucked up my booking from the beginning so only my return flight was paid for not the departure :) so after easily deciding I was NOT going to pay $580 for a one-way outbound ticket, I had to quickly figure out my next move. (PRO TIP: ALWAYS BOOK DIRECTLY WITH COMPANIES THEY’LL WORK WITH YOU AND REFUND YOU IF SOMETHING GOES WRONG. EVEN IF YOU SEE A CHEAPER PRICE ON ONE OF THOSE TRAVEL SITES SOMEONE TOLD ME THEY’LL PRICE MATCH YOU AND EVEN GIVE YOU DIFFERENT FLIGHT ACCOMMODATIONS LIKE CHANGING LAYOVER FLIGHTS IT’S MAGICAL). Everyone I’m living with went to Spain the day before, so after bending over backwards to try and get the house key from my grandmother who already passed through security (she couldn’t wait for me bc the guy at security had 5 min to wheelchair her to her gate), I found a way to contact her (a blessing bc if not I would have had to stay at a hotel or something) and had her hand me the keys back to our place. I didn’t have the patience to take a bus back to the city so I paid the extra fare to Uber back home. The weird part is I’m not even mad. After calling the airlines, contacting my parents, contacting my family already in Spain that I wouldn’t be going, I was just… chilling. Got some groceries and I’ve been living la vida loca just eating and watching netflix lol. Sure, I wanted to go see a new country and even try to see the town my great grandparents were from, but if there’s anything I learned this year is… everything happens for a reason. I think it would have been an amazing trip, but there’s a reason I didn’t get to travel this weekend. Theres a reason I had to leave my job at the bank. Theres a reason I’m here in Prague in the first place. There’s a reason I’m witnessing this entire Mess. I guess there’s some growth in that too you know what I mean? Younger me would have probably combusted in hatred and be extremely negative and complain that “my life sucks” when in reality it’s fine it’s just in general, shitty things happen…. but life won’t stop for anybody not even me. On the bright side, some good lessons came out of this experience. Forget 2016, this was the real year of realizing things™. I’m going back to Miami with a completely different drive and mindset. For example, I knew school is important and I get good grades, but my attitude towards my education is COMPLETELY different now. Being “good” just isn’t good enough for me anymore. With my grades now I could get into a “good” grad school, but now I don’t even want “good” I want something better. I want great I want the best I want to work my ass off to get into an AMAZING school. I still don’t know everything or even want I want 100%, but this trip has helped me change how I plan to approach/execute my future goals. That “oh I guess I’ll work someday idk that’s a long time from now so I don’t care I’ll worry about it another day” won’t cut it anymore. Now that I’m thinking about it, a lot of things need changing when I get back. Which speaking of getting back, I’m counting down the days I’m so excited I leave at the end of the month ayee!! Lol okay I feel like I’m just rambling at this point. There were a few more things I wanted to say buut………… I forgot it so I’ll just end it here and make a new post if I remember lol. Even if no one reads this, future me will and she’ll remember how the Ctrl album from SZA was playing in the background while writing this and probably cringe at how bittersweet this whole experience/year has been.

TLDR I learned a lot on this internship (good and bad) and I’m basically going back home a new person :-)

[ehy1]

MY OC IS HEEEEEEEEEREEE!!!!

First of all, this is gonna be a little bit, (who am i kidding?) THIS IS GONNA BE A LOT OF INFORMATION, so just advising you what is coming. LOVE YOU ALL!! 

Clothes inspiration, HAIR, and tattoo.

Name: Shika Sayaka/ Sayaka Shika

Name meaning: Shika (deer of good heart/with excellent intentions) Sayaka (Saya: pure, fresh, clean... Ka: from "kaze=wind"... Fresh air blow).

Age: 16

Birthday: October 11th

Gender: female

Height: 1.63 cm

Weigh:  40 kg

Ethnics: Japanese.

Eyes color: Hazel

Skin color: white with pink sub tone

Hobbies: dissecting flowers, listening to music, drawing, doing gymnastics, singing, dancing, playing basketball, astrology.

Debilities: her lover, it's very sensitive (body).

Style: elegant and feminine.

Sign: Libra

Birthmarks: a mole next to her belly bottom, down her right eye, a collar of them in the right arm and two of them next to each other in the left hand (they seem like a vampire bite mark).

Tattoos: a lotus flower in her left leg.

Hair color: baby pink, pastel blue, lilac and cream.

Fears: the ocean, rivers, lakes, sharks, everything that she can't she. (This means a creature that is there but you can't see it, she is afraid that she can't protect herself).

Significant other: Subaru Sakamaki

🙋Personality.🙋

Shika is a girl that loves to help other people, is very social and polite, she can be hurt easily but she will never accept it. Has a lot of pride, and she doesn't stand people who makes feel other ones small or worthless. She is determinate and positive. She's a little crazy, likes to think about life but mostly about death and in the human nature. She is never in only one side, she has the "grey" theory (there's not just black and white). Sometimes she can be sarcastic and is very joker. She can pass to be the kindest and gentle person in the world to the cruelest and coldest person you have ever seen.you can find her daydreaming, with the stare in other world (this is because she likes to philosophize). She is good at martial arts and in the art, she can break a face with her fist and she can also take ants with her fingers with a delicately that they won't get hurt. She's romantic but realist. Cruel but gentle and warm. It's really difficult that she falls in love. She always flows like the wind, never stops. Is charming and flirty. Knows how to give good advice to the people that asks for her help and protects with her sole to the ones that she loves. Is a big fan of astrology.

Shika es una chica que ama ayudar a las personas, es muy social y educada, amable; pueden herir sus sentimientos fácilmente pero nunca lo va a admitir. Tiene mucho orgullo y no tolera a las personas que hacen sentir a los demás menos o inservibles. Es determinada y positiva. Está un poco loca, le gusta pensar sobre la vida pero sobre todo sobre la muerte y la naturaleza humana. Ella nunca está solo de un lado, tiene la filosofía del "gris" (no hay solo blanco y negro). A veces puede ser sarcástica y es muy bromista. Puede pasar de ser la persona más linda y tierna del mundo a la chica más fría y cruel que hayas conocido. La puedes encontrar fantaseando despierta, con la mirada en otro mundo (esto es por qué le gusta mucho filosofar). Es buena en las artes marciales y en el arte, puede romper una cara con su puño y también puede tomar hormigas con sus dedos con tal delicadez que no las lastimara. Es romántica pero realista. Cruel pero amable y cálida. Es muy difícil que se enamore. Ella avanza como el viento, nunca se detiene. Es encantadora y coqueta. Sabe dar buenas consejos a personas que piden su ayuda y protege con su alma a los que ama. Ama la astrología.

👍Strengths.- determinate, brave, makes things and decisions since what is fair, likes the justice, sincere, loyal, cheerful (when you get to know her), polite.

👎Flaws.- can't stand crowds of people, a bit shy, hides her feelings (even to herself), she can be cold at times, bad at maths, doesn't take care of herself, distracted, a little bit lazy.

😳😳Biography.😳😳

Just one intention... Help... And why lie, to satisfy her curiousness too. She never belonged to just one place, her abilities and nature weren't from just one dimension, she... Was different. When a group of people, that are actually vampires, (she doesn't see the great difference anyway) appeared in her life the girl felt that she had to help, but something that has never happened.... Happened, one of her plans didn't work as expected, she got stuck in a different dimension, with twelve vampires that could devour her, thought stay positive wasn't enough, now everything was unpredictable and her nature has changed, to be honest .... Everything has changed.

She will teach them so many things, makes them feel different, but she is not the only one writing a new story, they will transform her, hurt her and one thing that she has always been afraid of... Falling in love.

Other relationships:

Shu Sakamaki.- he was one of her options when she had the obligation of choosing someone to "take care of her". He gets annoyed with Shika 'cause sometimes she's too loud.

💕Shika's comment.- I want life and destiny to make him feel happy.

Reiji Sakamaki.- Shika likes to help him with the cleaning, but she refuses to take cook lessons since she is helpless in the kitchen and Reiji agrees with that. The vampire enjoys to make experiments with her since she is half yōkai and half human. She is polite with him and sometimes gives him some advice, he tells her that he doesn't need tips from a "mixture-of-creatures" but he is actually grateful about her caring. (She is always alert when she is with him).

💕Shika'comment.- at first I thought that he was someone that I could rely on, since he is a kind of authority, but I was wrong, he won't help me -.-", ... Buuuuut I think that he only needs a little bit of attention and love☺️.

Ayato Sakamaki.- when they first met he felt like if fire increased inside of him (the fault is her essence -.-"), and this happens whenever he is with her. They enjoy to play basketball together and make careers when they swim. He gets annoyed when she wins the challenges, he hates the idea that Shika can't and doesn't want to cook, he gets really jealous of all the guys that gets the attention of Shika.

💕Shika's comment.- I like to be with him it's fun to Ayato, but when I catch him looking at my boobs I really get annoyed -.-"

Laito Sakamaki.- they are just friends. Shika feels free when she is with him, she has decided to show him what real love is. She doesn't get scared when he attempts to harass her since she is not that innocent anymore. He finds interesting how can a demon be kind and caring and he  wants to break that part of her.

💕Shika's comment.- he and me are similar, even in the things that aren't good, that's why I appreciate him so much ☺️.

Kanato Sakamaki.- she is a pro at making people happy and manipulate them at some grade, so she founds different ways to keep kanato calm, she is terrified of what he can do and tries to keep away from him. He gets annoyed when she doesn't have time to play, he likes to dress her like a doll.

💕Shika's comment.- ......LOOK! What a beautiful day!..... *Runs away*

Subaru Sakamaki.- he founds her annoying but at the same time interesting, she is always positive and that keeps an eye of the vampire on her, he is confused why does she deny's that she is a good person. She founds him a good guy, he makes her feel feelings and make her remember that she has a sensible part in her soul.

💕Shika's comment.- he's the type of person that gets annoyed by me, that makes me sad, I want to be his friend, but I think that this situation is going to be more difficult than I thought 😓

Ruki Mukami.- they get a long well, also she likes to hear him when he reads, they talk about books too. He makes her demonstrate her tsundere side and his goal is to make her blush. Shika feels relax when she is with him. He enjoys to make her vulnerable and summit her since she has a wild side, she gets nervous when he demonstrates his "master" kink.

💕Shika's comment.- I admire him, he is brave and will give everything for the sake of his brothers ☺️☺️

Kou Mukami.- they are like bros, when they are together they talk (the volume is too loud though) he always wants to make her wear cat tails and ears, but Shika never agrees. When there is free time they like to make mini-concerts where they sing and dance a lot. Kou has a crush on her. When his sadist nature appears he makes cruel comments only to make her sad or turn down her light, but she frustrates him with not giving up on the idea that in this world there is always light.

💕Shika's comment.- he makes me feel curiousness, I want him to be himself with me and I want him to feel free and loved, he has hurt me so much though.

Yuma Mukami.- when Shika is with him she is playful, she likes to make pranks on him since she thinks that he is just like a teddy bear, he gets annoyed by this and he defends himself telling her that she is just a tiny-pig. He is fire, and she is air, that makes them feel like if they complement each other. He makes her demonstrate her tsundere side too. She likes to help him in the garden and always ask for help for keep beautiful her flowers and her strawberries plants.

💕Shika's comment.- his height doesn't bother me, or make me feel afraid, it is not the first time that a person of his height wants to intimidate me, he is natural and loyal, Yuma is a good friend.

Azusa Mukami.- he founds her caring and polite, they just like to take walks around the Mukami mansion and if he wants...talk about something. Shika sees Azusa like a child that has to be protected, she hugs him a lot because she founds him as the most tender and cute thing in the world.

💕Shika's comment.- I want to protect his pureness at all costs! I know what does it feels like to have your purity and innocence been taking away from you, I don't want anybody to hurt him!

Carla tsukimani.- she's afraid of him, Shika is polite and really quiet when the first blood is around.

💕Shika's comment.- He makes me nervous, is a person that I think I may not be able to handle.

Shin Tsukinami.- he has tried to kidnap her. Now they are just friends.

💕Shika's comment.- I know that he can be a good guy but, his life has made him very violent and.....*sigh* well it's a long story.

❤️❤️Abilities.❤️❤️

-can turn into a yōkai (Japanese demon).

-can control the air.

-uses a hammer ( she can also use multiple katanas, but those are rare to be used by her)

-can travel through dimensions (she is still learning, and ... She's stuck actually)

-has skills to paint and draw

-good at sports and learning languages.

❤️❤️Curiosities.❤️❤️

✌she gets the top of her energy at 6:00 pm. (Feels inspired or motivated to do things)

✌Likes the color pink

✌Has tsundere tendencies, just with some of the guys.

✌When she is nervous, tends to pass one finger through one eyebrow.

✌The "leader" role fits her surprisingly well when it is needed.

✌She can be submissive or the one in charge, (tends to be submissive)

✌️she is sensitive to the "other world" (ghosts) since she was little.

🍗 FAVORITE FOOD!!! 🍗

Steak

Strawberries covered with chocolate

Banderillas

Chili, chili AND MORE CHILI!!!

Well, this is all, THANK YOU FOR READING!!!! I will wait for your asks and everything that you want. 

[passionate-baker]

Winter Weekend in Westport

Friends, I have to be honest with you: Westport was never one of the places on my “to-go list”. Why would I want to go to a small town tucked away in the back arse of nowhere? A trip to Westport would have meant leaving Dublin behind to experience that true Irish-country-feel that tourists seem to revel in, & to be honest, the smell of cow poop that comes to mind when I think of previous country visits doesn’t do all that much for me. Then Boyfriend came along. He spoke of the wonders of the Wild West & insisted time and time again that we visit Westport together, because apparently I would love it. I was skeptical, but when Boyfriend uses his puppy dog eyes on me I am rendered entirely powerless (which he 100% uses to his advantage). 

We set out for Westport in January 2016, and returned again in December 2016. 2019 edit: since then, we have visited a further two times - Boyfriend always knows best.

It takes just over three hours to drive from Dublin to Westport, & the journey is filled with the most gorgeous landscape views. With the ‘Into The Wild’ soundtrack playing on full volume, we drove from one side of the country to the other & eventually touched down in Co. Mayo. I had never been to Mayo before, but ever since our first visit to Westport, I’ve been hooked. There’s just something about the place that hits you in the face & sticks in your mind long after your visit has ended - a certain type of magic that you can’t really put your finger on. You can taste it in the air, see it in all of the quaint little shopfronts, & feel it when you venture into your first Westport pub for a local Mescan beer.

STAY 

The Wyatt Hotel // a charming hotel filled with character. Perfect location, excellent rooms, extremely friendly & helpful staff, not one single thing we could fault it on. Added bonus: the bar in the hotel does an outstanding club sandwich, which is not a statement we would make lightly. 

The Mill Times Hotel // a very central hotel. Located just off the main street, this is a standard, cheap hotel. The room was comfortable & the breakfasts in the morning were hearty and filling.  

EAT

An Port Mor // an absolute must. An adorable, quaint little restaurant from the outside, a real deal seriously great restaurant on the inside. The food is outstanding, perhaps the best we’ve had in all of Ireland. Every single meal we’ve had there - yes, there have been a few - has left us in awe, wanting to come back again the very next night. The service is impeccable. A little pricier than most places in Westport, but after one bite of your roasted pig cheek you’ll forget all about that, we promise. 

The Pantry & Corkscrew // the sheer volume of glowing reviews for this place on Trip Advisor piqued our interest so much that we had to try it out. The whole truth: I have never been so pleasantly surprised in my whole life! We loved it so much we cancelled one of our bookings & ate here two nights in a row. Pro tip: get the fried chicken - mouthwatering, moist, tender, crispy & delicious! 

Cronin’s Sheebeen // a 40-minute trek out of Westport town, the Sheebeen is the perfect place to refuel. I don’t know about where you live, but in Dublin when you eat in a pub it’s always the same dried out food that you always regret eating. Cronin’s Sheebeen is so far away from that, the food is always delicious. The goat’s cheese starter is a winner - it comes baked in angel hair pastry & it is the most delicious & delicate thing ever. Added bonus: they do a ‘smoked bacon mashed potato’ that tastes exactly like Bacon Fries. Trust. 

DRINK

Matt Molloy’s // this is one of those places in Westport that everyone goes to - if you say you’re going to a pub, people assume you mean Matt Molloy’s & that’s just the way it is. If you push through to the back room, you might get lucky & secure a seat beside the fire where you can watch the live band play every night. Alternatively, if you find yourself seated at the bar there’s a great collection of American police badges pinned up all over the walls from all sorts of random towns & cities. 

McGing’s // definitely our favourite pub in Westport. I mean, have you seen the outside? A grey dull building that is entirely brought to life by the mad bright colours of the pub. Walking in through the doors is like stepping back in time to one of those great pubs your grandparents used to drink in, so full of character & warmth. In the sitting room - yes, there’s a sitting room - there’s a lovely blazing fire to keep warm while you sip away on your Mescan. What more could you ask for?

The Gallery Boutique Wine Bar // a chic little wine bar to nestle into for a glass of wine. When we asked the owner, Tom, what wines he had by the glass he answered us with a question: what would you like? Two glasses of malbec later, we were satisfied customers. 

DO

Marlene’s Chocolate Haven // the only place I have ever ordered a hot chocolate & actually enjoyed it. Basically, the inside of the cup is coated with luscious melted chocolate & piping hot milk is poured into the middle. Two options: stir thoroughly to feel like you’re drinking liquid chocolate or do it my way & scoop all of the melty chocolate out with your spoon & make a right mess. 

Hunt down some Mescan // this one goes without saying. Do it. 

This Must Be The Place // a beautiful new cafe occupying the space where WTR was. The menu is healthy and fresh, filled with original ideas not found anywhere else in Westport. The food is delicious - as is the coffee - so much so that Boyfriend & I stopped in for a speedy lunch before setting off home. Pro tip: get the homemade beans with the feta and the chorizo, it is mouthwatering-ly good. 

Willow Tea Rooms // adorable little tea rooms just beside the clock tower (with an A+ window display also), serving up a huge choice of loose leaf teas & cute little baked goods. I’m a sucker for a cute mince pie & this was definitely the best one I’ve had in my whole life - heated ever so slightly with a healthy (or not so healthy) dollop of softly whipped cream. Perfection. 2019 edit: now closed, but leaving this here for the memories.